Page 431 of The Doctors Will See You Now

I rubbed at my forehead and swept the hand down my face. Jesus Christ, this was bad. I honestly couldn’t remember what I’d done on camera. How many times Charlotte had been to my office or what we’d done in plain sight.

I’d known from the beginning that this stupid show was a bad idea, but I’d allowed myself to be roped in, and now there was a chance I was going to lose everything.

I worked hard to gather my thoughts. I might be freaking the fuck out in my head, but that was the absolute last thing I wanted to convey to Winnie. My panic or guilt wouldn’t help anything here.

“Wow. I had no idea. I completely understand why you’re upset, and I wish I hadn’t done the show.” What a fucking understatement. “I don’t know what they’ll do to me in the limelight, but you have to know Lexi is the most important thing in my life. I know I fucked up for a long time, I know I missed everything she had to offer, but I won’t do that again. Please, Win,” I begged. I imagined the fallout of my episodes as they started to air and closed my eyes. “Just, please, remember that.”

“I know,” she comforted softly. “All of us can see the change in you, Lexi included. She’s so attached to you now.” She laughed. “In fact, the first thing she said this morning was that she had twelve hours and forty-five minutes until she saw you.”

I smiled. Despite the pain, despite fear of the future.

Winnie sighed again. “I’m sorry I got all defensive. Whatever they do with your episodes, I’m sure we’ll work through it, okay? I hope I didn’t ruin your day too much.”

The plexiglass divider in front of me shook as the cab driver pounded on it to get my attention. I looked up to see I was there, St. Luke’s shooting up into the sky beside us as people hustled down the sidewalks and through the street all around us.

I yanked some cash from my pocket and handed it to the cabbie, holding my phone between my shoulder and my ear as I climbed out.

“I get it, Win. You’re looking out for our daughter. I’m just trying to do that now too.”

“I know that. I really do.”

“Good.”

She paused, so long that I was about to tell her I had to go, and then she spoke again. “Though, you’ve been a real grouch the last couple of weeks. Think your mood is going to be any better when you pick Lex up tonight, or should I start preparing my force field now?”

“You should probably set up the force field now,” I admitted candidly. She laughed. “I will try, though.”

“What happened?”

I shook my head and groaned. I didn’t know what to say, considered a million different options, but eventually settled on a partial truth. “Just a breakup. It didn’t work out.”

“Wow. I don’t know the circumstances, but it honestly seemed like it was the real thing.”

“It was.” After realizing how that probably didn’t make any sense to her, I amended my answer. “I thought it was.”

“Well, all right. I’ll allow the grumpiness for a little while longer, then. And instead of the force field, I’ve got ice cream—a much stronger weapon when it comes to combatting heartbreak.”

I laughed. The flavor had better be “atomic.”

Stuff tucked away in my office and white coat on, I headed down the hall to do rounds. I was an hour earlier than my scheduled time, but after about five minutes, I’d known I couldn’t sit inside my office without going crazy. I had to be out, hands-on, getting shit done.

I’d just turned the corner from the hall with the cafeteria, forgoing coffee in an effort to avoid people, when I heard someone yell my name.

“Nick!”

I wasn’t compelled to slow, fearful of what face-to-face interaction with another human being would be like right now, but I did look back over my shoulder to see who it was.

That just made it worse.

Will Cummings. Just the person I didn’t want to see.

I turned back forward, never breaking stride, but the slap of his feet on the tile as he jogged to catch up had me clenching my fists.

“Nick, hold up,” he called.

“No, Will,” I refused as he got close and tried to keep time with my quick strides. “I don’t feel like talking. I don’t feel like commiserating over your fallen reputation, and I don’t feel like forgiving you for talking me into this mess.” I knew there was no real way Will could have known the direction this show would go or the unintended consequences it would have on my life, but anger wasn’t reasonable. So neither was I.

Down the hall, he didn’t give up, keeping time with me at an annoying jog for at least another fifty or sixty feet. I expelled a frustrated breath and stopped as I realized I wasn’t going to get rid of him that easily.