Page 24 of Hybrid Heroics

A few weeks ago, when we were all sitting around the fire, under the dome Grim had put up. That was when I knew.

There was one instance where she gazed around our large group of friends and siblings and mates. And she simply smiled at her odd collection of family.

After losing my parents so young, the only thing I had ever wanted was a family. I’d found that with the guys, but Sloane had multiplied it in a way only she could manage.

Vaughn’s sisters were the easiest example I had. Sloane had respected Freya’s need for privacy without even realizing how important it was. She’d respected Ruby’s opinions and desire to fight. And she’d included Tilly instead of saying she was too young to be useful, even when the little fae was hateful toward her.

One thing I had realized was that we were always learning something new about our mate. It wasn’t always right there in our faces; sometimes we had to search for the clues. But they were there. In each conversation, in each action, in the seldom downtime, in the way she moved… The hints were everywhere, and though I didn’t recall when I started looking, seeking those small moments was addicting.

That gave me a new understanding of York.

He’d been with Sloane for years before he was captured. He had already seen the vulnerability that we saw when we got to Amelia’s house. And he knew what a rollercoaster her emotions were when she wasn’t in control. He even knew that dying hurt her, but that she took it in stride. Maybe he didn’t know that she was feeding off the pain, but neither did she until recently.

I was thankful we didn’t feel the pain from her deaths, because I didn’t think I could take it without losing my fucking mind. Feeling her pain when Palmer died had been enough to shatter my thoughts and flay my heart open.

But not feeling her pain was currently an issue. What if this was the one time she was hurt and needed us? We didn’t know what she was feeling, and though her emotions didn’t pulse strongly through our bond when it was whole, occasionally a trickle of some insight would slip by.

Now, she was here, but she wasn’t. There was no trickle or tug between us. Only a hollow lifeline, making me feel like I was slowly bleeding out, becoming less of myself with each passing hour.

That was how I knew I wasn’t the same person I was a month ago. If someone had told me then that I would be this lost without my mate, I would have keeled over in laughter. But until a few hours ago, I didn’t understand the full force of our bond and the Pith tokens. They really did open our souls to each other…

And now I was missing part of mine, though I thought for a second just then that I could feel her humor invading my chest. It was probably memory recall, but the sense of irony didn’t leave me.

The one time I truly let myself think through the anomaly that was my mate would be the one time she allowed herself to eavesdrop on my thoughts.

“Are you going to stand there all day?” York asked, snapping his fingers in front of my face.

“Hmm?”

Novak squinted his eyes as he leaned closer to me. “You haven’t moved for like an hour. You barely even blinked.”

“Oh. Were you talking to me?” I frowned, then shook my head. “Am I in your way?”

The vampire made a show of looking around the spacious living area and where I was leaned against the wall. He threw his hands up as he walked away.

“Are you good?” Vaughn inquired, his voice barely a whisper.

I shrugged, answering just as quietly. “I don’t know.”

“Talia and Latharian cooked dinner for us,” he explained. “They’ve all gone to the dining room. Maybe you should eat something, too.”

I wasn’t hungry, but I followed the fae anyway. I’d rather be in the comfort of our group; so if they were all in there, then I would be as well.

Dinner would be uneventful without the mayhem of our mate, which meant that I could tune everyone out. I was running on autopilot, still trying to gather my thoughts, when I blinked out of my stupor.

I didn’t know how long I had been silent, but York’s tone had called me back to reality. There was a slight edge to his voice, leading me to believe he was anxious or suspicious. He sounded like this wasn’t the first time he had asked his question, either.

“Isn’t Aunt Talia going to eat?” York inquired, a shrewd gaze glued to Latharian.

“I’m sure she’ll eat.” His uncle waved his hand toward their kitchen. “You know how she likes to snack while she cooks.”

Sterling narrowed her eyes, like her father might be lying. “Where did she go?”

A cold shiver ran up my spine as everyone turned to Latharian. He kept his head tilted down, glaring at his plate as his eyes wobbled strangely. I thought I saw the colors of his irises bounced between his grassy green and a milky brown.

I was out of my chair before he could speak. “I’m going to check on Sloane.”

Footsteps echoed around me, and I glanced over my shoulder to see Briggs and Palmer following along. The mage was tense, a step in front of the hulking wolf. I was waiting for claws or fur to burst forth, but he clenched his fists as he nodded to me.