Page 34 of Roundabout

“Can I come see you?”

“Uh-huh. Come see me at Bett-ett’s.”

Coty murmurs something I’m almost positive I won’t like.

“I’ll be fast,” I say, in case Coty’s close enough to hear me. I’ll pull the birthday card if I have to. I just want to see them.

“Mommy fast.”

Coty’s deep voice clearly rumbles, “No, she’s not. Daddy’s fast.”

Jace giggles, repeating, “Mommy fast.”

A grin pulls at my lips. He’s saying it just to get under his dad’s skin now. Fine by me. Whatever gets Coty to loosen up a bit, maybe even talk to me directly.

I didn’t do any of the things he accused me of. I didn’t even consider doing the things he accused me of. I didn’t cheat on him. I didn’t run. I didn’t try taking Jace from him. I didn’t cancel the wedding. And I sure as hell didn’t sell my engagement ring.

That’s not to say I’m completely innocent. I did break his trust. I did lie to him. And I did hide things from him. But I thought…I mean, I hoped…that Coty would do what he always does. I hoped he’d read me and read my heart, and see that I really did what I thought I had to. He knows as well as I do that once siblings are put into the system, they can be separated—easily. Not all foster families can, or will, take on more than one child at a time; so every single day siblings that enter foster care together are split up. And that’s assuming the girls even made it into the system. Nora was keeping them home from school, not for the same reasons I am, but so nobody would see how bad off Brittni and Makya were and report her again.

Any person in our family would’ve done the same. They would’ve.

They could’ve…if I let them.

Now that I’m not facing that same fight-or-flight reaction I’ve always struggled with, I can look back and admit I panicked. I could’ve stopped to talk to someone, anyone, about what was going on. Paige and Bentlee were right. I’m used to taking on battles singlehandedly. It doesn’t matter that it wasn’t me I was fighting for, I still pushed Coty away to win, and that’s not the kind of victory I want on my record. He’s been in my corner for so long, he’s had my back in every situation. The only fight I haven’t encountered is the one for Coty.

“Actually, Jace, I think Mommy’s faster,” I say, then hold my breath. Will he repeat it?

“Mommy faster?”

A chuckle leaves my lips. “Yep, I’m faster. Way faster.”

“Mommy faster.”

There’s some rustling on the other end before one of the best sounds I’ve heard in three days comes across the speaker as Coty says, “I’m faster.”

I hang up wearing a full-blown smile. He spoke to me. Maybe he’s open to listening to me, too.

Jogging up the stairs, I tell the girls to get their shoes on and meet me in the Jeep.

I chose Coty then, and I’m choosing him now.

CHAPTER 10

Coty

The long grass brushes against the legs of my jeans as I look out over the canyon. My property sits below Beck’s off to the side, and Marc’s is far enough away in the distance that I can barely make out someone’s cloud of dust behind them as they race around the track.

Angela’s Jeep pulls from our garage and my shoulders sag watching her reverse down our driveway slowly.

Slowly, because I’m definitely the faster one of us.

Except for this week. I started out feeling behind on everything, and now, I am behind on everything.

Angela books it up Beck’s driveway, but I don’t move from my spot. I came out here as soon as she hung up. She can visit Jace. I’d never actually try to keep him from her, I just…I don’t want to see her right now. I can’t. If I see her without her engagement ring again, I’ll fucking…I don’t know.

I could rage at her, let out all the shit I’ve been keeping in since I first saw her finger missing the ring I proposed to her with, or I could fall at her feet and beg her to take me back because I miss her that. Fucking. Much. I miss Angela. I even miss the girls, too. I miss my entire family being together. I feel like I’m walking around with half my body missing. Every step I take is wobbly and unsure.

Which is why I’m so pissed off that she didn’t trust me.