Page 123 of Let the Light Shine Through

“You don’t have to save me from anything.” I reach for her, missing those same hands as she backs up. With each word, my voice rises, burning my throat from the inside out. “I didn’t go into this blind.”

I knew there was a chance my time with Gia would be limited, but it didn’t stop me from falling for her. I don’t think anything could’ve.

“Just tell him, G.” Rowdy sounds closer, like he too is struggling with whatever she’s not saying.

“I got it,” she says, and one second I’m staring directly into the most beautiful face I’ve ever seen, the next I’m looking up at it from the ground as my knees buckle beneath me. Pebbles pierce the skin on my shins while I fight to catch my breath.

“The scab?” It comes out as light as the wind dancing between us, as broken as the dried leaves under my knees.

Gia nods and Rowdy, inching closer, says, “She just got the results back for it yesterday.”

“Is it melanoma?” I ask anyone that’ll answer. Melanoma is the deadliest form of skin cancer. It can still be treatable, but it depends. It depends on a lot, like when it’s discovered.

We should’ve had it checked sooner. I shouldn’t have taken up so much of her time. Gia’s right, I am clingy.

“Squamous cell carcinoma.”

I remember seeing that one come up when I researched skin cancer. It can be deadly as well, but it’s treatable, if you catch it in time.

“What stage?”

“I have to see an oncologist for that.”

“Where?”

Gia looks away.

“Where?” I demand. The good thing about where we live is we’re three hours away from several big cities with all sorts of top-of-the-line specialists. Where other people have to fly in from all over the world to get that kind of care, we only have a short drive.

“Somewhere local,” Rowdy mutters.

Another quack running his practice out of a multifamily house? Why would she do that?

Because not everyone is born with their noses in the air.

Fuck me.

Al probably doesn’t even have health insurance, and how else would Gia be able to cover the medical expenses she’s about to rack up?

Unless she’s not planning to at all.

“I tried to tell you this would happen,” Gia says, staggering forward several steps, tears streaming down her face. “You didn’t wanna listen.”

“Are you saying you wouldn’t do it again? Because I would. I’d fall for you again and again and again.” I drag her to me, pressing my forehead to her middle and close my eyes tightly.

Ultimately, there’s no way to really know what someone’s fate will be. Vita couldn’t have known that she’d die of cancer just like her mom. And just because Vita did, doesn’t mean Gia will. She can fight this. We can fight this. Just like in Switzerland, I have the resources, but now I actually have the time, too. I have the fucking time…as long as time’s still on my side.

Using a finger, Gia lifts my chin, forcing me to look into her eyes.

“I’m saying I’m not doing it this time.” No. “I’m ending this now. I’m not taking you down with me.” No, no, no.

She pushes, and I sit back on my heels, mashing my lips together.

“We’re through, Roz.”

This can’t be it.

She walks past me, stopping when she hears me whisper, “How many more times are you gonna kick my legs out from under me?”