Page 99 of Baby for the Bratva King

“He came home with blood on his shirt one night. He does unspeakable things and I excuse it, just because it feels good to be wanted. He appreciates me, and I don’t even have to lift a finger.”

“He can appreciate you, maybe even love you, but is it enough to turn his head completely?”

I feel like I’m falling into the abyss, my stomach constantly lurching.

“I’m sorry, this isn’t what you want to hear.”

“Yesterday, you were saying how Felix just wanted to feel good about himself.”

“That was before you told me he was a psycho. I’m still pissed you lied to me.”

“Technically, it was more about withholding information.”

“Technicalities don’t matter. Why did you keep this a secret?”

“Because I knew I would break my promise.”

“You think I care about you breaking promises?” A tear forms in Fleur’s eye, but she wipes it away before it falls. “I already lost one family member. I won’t lose another.” She sniffles. “And yes—I may not remember mom, but if I lose my big sister, I lose my entire world.”

I envelope Fleur in a hug, squeezing her tight.

“I understand you, and I hate to be a bitch about this, but I’m also incredibly selfish and I need my sister.”

I hold her tight. “I need you too, but what about the money?”

“You’re kidding, right?” scoffs Fleur, stepping back. “You’re a pole dancing superstar. Log into your account. Check out how many views your videos are getting.”

“You might want to look at the comments,” I wince.

“Which only drives more reach to your page.” Fleur shrugs. “Who cares what people think. Your dreams are finally coming true.”

“All thanks to a man.”

“Felix may have had a slight influence, but you’re killing it out there. You always wanted this, more than you ever wanted any of those other jobs.”

I wipe down the pole and grab my stuff, preparing to leave the studio. My online presence may be growing exponentially, but what about the pain in my chest? The baby growing in my belly? That is also exponentially growing, and it will soon start affecting my training.

Felix was too good to be true, and it hurts that the journey might now be over.

But who says the ending has to be sad? If I can work on my technique, find a routine and start posting tutorials regularly, I might finally find my safe haven.

“I’m in love with Saskia. We’re having this child together, and one day I plan to marry her.”

I play Felix’s interview on repeat as I’m walking home, staring at his gorgeous face.

He fooled the world, but is he fooling me? I’ll put my heart in the palm of his hand and let him squish it. It’s toxic. What kind of impression will that give to the child?

I place a hand over my lower abdomen, feeling slightly better about the pregnancy. What if I can give this baby the childhood I wish I had? I could shower it with love. Make amends.

But I have to fix myself first.

I turn off the main street, darkness looming in every direction. The council doesn't bother with lights down this street—something to do with saving electricity. It’s all bullshit. This part of Queens may as well be written off the map.

Manhattan glows in the distance on this clear night, the high-rises twinkling in the night sky.

As the day draws to a close, my heart yearns for Felix. I want his arms wrapped around me. I want to be back in London sitting across from him at the dinner table, flirting, talking about relatable things; ending the night with his cock deep inside of me.

Will I ever experience that euphoric high again?