Page 4 of It Runs in the Family

“I have a date with my pillow.” She shoved the baby at me, still holding JJ under his armpits, his arms and legs dangling like he was a marionette.

“I’m all for your nap, Rita—that’s why I’m here—but I need your car seat. I can’t just lay him on the seat.”

“That’s what Granny did with our mothers.”

“What if I hit the brakes, and he rolls onto the floorboard?” I asked in disbelief, hoping she was about to tell me she was joking. Instead, she just stood there, still holding out her baby like she was re-enacting The Lion King. I wouldn’t have thought it possible, but she held him out even farther.

I took the baby and cradled him in the crook of my arm. “Where’s the car seat, Rita?” I asked, starting to get pissed.

“In my car.”

I wiggled the fingers of my free hand. “Give me the keys.”

“You can’t take my car.”

“Why not? You’re about to fall into a coma, but if it makes you feel better, I’ll leave the keys to mine.” I shifted JJ into my other arm to dig them out of my jean shorts pocket. “But I just got new tires a couple of weeks ago, so don’t be driving it unless it’s absolutely necessary.”

“I’m taking a very long nap, not going on a shopping trip,” she said in a snotty tone. “And besides, what do you think I’m gonna do to your tires?”

“Lord only knows.” Rita didn’t have the best luck with cars. She was notorious for running tires against curbs. Not to mention, a few years ago, she ignored the oil dripping underneath her car, and the engine locked up.

“And besides, hello!” I lifted the baby in my arm slightly higher. “I’m doing you a favor. Lose the attitude.”

Rita wiped her face, contrition in her eyes as her hand dropped. “Sorry. I’m just so tired. I’ve been mean as a rattlesnake to everyone.”

I hoped she wasn’t mean to the baby, but while Rita likely wouldn’t win any mother-of-the-year awards, I knew she wouldn’t hurt her kid. She’d seen what I’d lived through. Her life hadn’t been much peachier. Then again, her judgement had gotten worse since she started seeing her loser boyfriend.

“Then get me your car keys, and you can collapse on your bed.”

Her gaze landed on JJ, and for the first time since I’d proposed this babysitting favor, she looked wary. “What are you gonna do with him?”

I didn’t want to admit I was relieved to see her apprehension. Instead, I propped my free hand on my hip. “I thought I’d take him to a titty bar. I mean, sure, he sees yours, but no doubt his daddy would be proud of him gettin’ an eyeful of some others.”

She scowled. “I know you’re not John Jacob’s biggest fan, but no need to be sniping at him like that.”

“Who said I was sniping?” I shook my head. “I’m takin’ JJ to Granny’s. I figure she’ll love the chance to see him, and then I thought we’d pay a visit to Garrett.”

“Garrett?”

I shrugged. “He missed Granny’s last dinner, and I want to make sure she didn’t bury his body on the back forty.” That wasn’t the reason, but she didn’t need to know that.

Rita snort laughed. “He’s her favorite, so I’m sure he’s safe.”

She had a point, but I wasn’t about to tell her the real reason for my visit. “Keys?”

“Can’t you just move the car seat to your own car? That’s what John Jacob and I do. Just switch back and forth.”

I wanted to tell her she should have the car seat installed by an expert, like a firefighter, but it was wasted breath. Especially since she was already heading back into the house, holding her middle finger up as she walked away.

“I take it that means you’re not bringing me the keys?” I called after her.

“The car’s unlocked. And it’s out of gas.” She walked into the house and shut the heavy wooden door.

I looked down at the baby cradled in my left arm. “I think your mother just told me to fuck off.” I cringed. “Sorry, JJ, I shouldn’t have cursed. Someone has to be a good influence on you, and between your parents and all your cousins, I’m probably the only one who’ll try. Which means I need to get my shit together.” I cringed when I realized I’d cussed again. Then again, I was sure he’d already heard ten times worse from his deadbeat dad, but that didn’t make me feel much better.

The rear-facing car seat was in the backseat of her car, along with the base. I set JJ in the seat and strapped him in. He started to fuss, so I dug through the diaper bag and found a binky and popped it in his mouth. The way he sucked on it suggested he was hungry and wouldn’t be appeased for long.

I hustled to install the base in the backseat of my old Ford Fusion. I considered going to the fire station myself to make sure he was safe, but JJ started wailing, so I decided I’d drive extra safe the few miles to our grandmother’s place.