Page 203 of Nyx

I roll my window halfway down, hoping the man who steps out of the guard booth doesn't pay much attention to Kayla, so alarm bells aren't sounded.

"We'd like to leave," I tell Recon as he walks closer to the car. "Please open the gate."

"Where are you headed this late in the evening?"

The question hits me in a way that makes me angry. It's very familiar, as if any man has a right to ask such questions and dictate when and where I can go, as if I don't have free will to make decisions about my own life.

It's the first time I've felt this way since stepping onto the property.

I sit a little straighter.

"Her child is ill. I'd like you to open the gate," I repeat.

His eyes dart to Kayla, making me sit forward a little more in an attempt to block his view.

"I think you should have someone go with you," he says, pulling his eyes back to me.

Kayla sobs harder, and I can feel the shudder of her body through the seat under me.

"We aren't prisoners," I snap, trying not to feel a little guilty for my brash tone.

I shouldn't feel embarrassed for standing up for myself, but that doesn't stop the heat from rising in my cheeks.

"Open the gate," I say in a more even but very firm tone.

Recon takes a step back, glancing back over me one last time before pushing a button on the remote in his hand.

I roll up my window before the gate fully opens, inching forward and driving away from our protective cocoon as soon as the opening is wide enough for my car to fit through.

"They're going to be so angry," Kayla whispers as we drive closer to the hospital.

"I don't think they'll be very impressed," I agree.

"Do you think they'll refuse to let us come back?"

My hands tremble on the steering wheel, the idea making my blood run cold. I hadn't considered the repercussions of us leaving, beyond them being upset we left without an escort.

"I don't know," I whisper, pressing my foot harder on the accelerator.

Chapter 49

Nyx

I have no idea what the fuck just happened or the real reason I was triggered into having those memories, but the last half hour has left me completely drained, as if I had run a marathon after a week without food or water.

I stumble back from the workbench, my eyes searching the room, afraid that someone might've stepped into the shop and witnessed what I have to consider a possible mental breakdown.

The shop is empty, with everyone else still inside enjoying each other's company.

I'm grateful to not have to explain what just happened to anyone else, because fuck if I know what happened myself.

With the decision made, knowing that I'm a monster created in the moments I decided to kill my own father, I know what path I have to take.

I can love her from a distance, but staying involved with Juliet isn't an option.

When given the choice, the monster will always take over. There's no stopping that side of me, no matter how much I wish things were different.

I can't give her the life she deserves, and I have to accept that and move on.