Page 170 of Nyx

I don't know what kind of services he got when he was younger, but I've never seen an organization like Cerberus that provides so many services across nearly every facet of situations like this. The kids and the women given the opportunity to work with them are very lucky.

"Is that why you joined the Marine Corps? To get away from him?"

His eyes look up, and the emotion behind them is gone, not a hint showing on his face. It reminds me of the look he gave me when I was here the first time, waiting for my interview with Kincaid, and he walked through the room.

"I killed him when I was sixteen."

I gasp, my training taking a back seat to the shock I feel at his confession.

"Does that make you afraid of me now?"

I shake my head immediately. "Of course not. I hate that you were forced into that situation. I can't imagine the lasting effects it could have on a young man."

"The lasting effects have been... helpful."

I tilt my head, confused and curious, but I'm not going to ask questions that delve deeper into his trauma. I'm not a therapist, and doing more damage or upsetting him isn't my goal.

"And your mom?" I ask even though I feel like I have no business knowing what happened with her.

"She wasn't happy that I killed him," he says. "She hated me for it."

"I'm sure she—"

"Until the day she died from liver failure, she never forgave me for what I did to him."

"I'm sorry," I tell him, not feeling guilty for the apology, despite our earlier conversation. "No one should have to live like that."

"That's why we do what we do," he says, his tone lifting a little, the sadness of his memories fading.

"I'm glad you told me."

"I just want you to know that I understand some of what you're going through. A lot of people here with and connected to Cerberus have had some pretty rocky starts. They don't let it define them, and eventually you'll be at a place where all of that pain and hurt will seem like a lifetime ago."

"I wish I had an exact date," I mutter, giving him a quick smile.

I pick up my fork and dig into the eggs, taking a bite and chewing thoughtfully.

"So many things would be solved if we knew exactly what the outcome of our lives was going to be," he says as he also begins to eat.

Chapter 43

Nyx

"You don't have to do that," I tell her when she carries our plates to the sink.

"I don't mind," she answers as she turns on the water. "You cooked. I can clean."

It feels like a very domestic thing to say, but I don't argue with her.

I stand back, trying to think of something more that I can say, something that will keep her spending time with me.

The plate clatters in the sink, the sound of it breaking echoing in the room. I watch as she instinctively reaches for it, my senses on high alert when she hisses and pulls her hand back, cradling it to her chest.

The sight of blood has never bothered me. I've spent a lifetime knowing that the presence of it usually means a job well done on my end, but when I step to the side and see the light trickle of blood seeping around the fingers she has wrapped around her opposite hand, I feel a wave of panic land right in the center of my chest.

"You cut yourself," I say stupidly, as if the last handful of seconds didn't explain that was exactly what happened.

"I'm so sorry," she says, looking down at the broken plate in the sink.