Page 101 of Nyx

I groan, opening my mouth and giving her the access she demands. My only thought, the only need my body seems to have, is to get this woman beneath me, joining us together in the most animalistic ways.

I inch closer, my arm wrapping around her back and pulling her flush against my body, and then I feel it.

The slightest pause and the way her body freezes is enough for me to stop.

I pull back, breaking the kiss and putting some distance between us.

It doesn't stop the increased heart rate or the flow of blood to my cock, but going forward isn't possible.

The lack of control, the inability to just shut it all off, makes my mind race. Since the night I stopped my father's abuse, every action, every move, every kill has been meticulous, planned, and processed with reasoning.

She has the ability to change all of that, and as unexpected as that is, I'm in no position right now to just accept it at face value.

Not being in control can't happen. Letting someone else have the ability to guide my actions makes me feel powerless.

I resist the urge to swipe at the wetness left on my lips as hard as I fight the need to sweep my tongue across it to get one last taste of her.

Her eyes are wild, her breath fast and unsteady.

"I didn't want you to stop," she confesses, her throat working on a swallow as if it took all the courage she could gather to speak those words.

"Your body did," I explain. "After what happened to you today... I won't be something you regret."

Trauma bonds are real, and I can't be a part of that for her.

Letting this go as far as it already has could increase her regret, and that won't do either of us any good.

Her safety, even if it's her mental health and not a physical derailment, over my desire is paramount.

I keep my eyes on her as she lifts her hand to her mouth, fingers pressing where my lips just were.

I use the moment to take another step back, putting even more space between us.

"You're safe," I remind her. "I need to check with my team. I'll be right outside if you need me."

I walk away before I let my mind wander, before I consider that maybe her response was just her shifting her weight and had nothing to do with a flash of building regret.

Chapter 26

Juliet

As frozen in place as I feel, I head right to the door after he closes it and throw the deadbolt in place, lifting up on my toes to watch him walk away in the peephole.

My hands tremble, and with all that has happened in recent days, I have no way of knowing if it's because of the kiss or all the fear that's causing me to respond this way.

I kissed him.

I initiated physical contact.

I can't recall the last time I was the one in the driver's seat for something like that.

I mean, I know I tried to appease Graham with intimacy, but when was the last time I did it because I wanted to?

I can't recall, and that has to mean something, right?

There has to be a reason or an explanation for taking that leap of faith.

I don't know whether to lean into what I've learned since escaping and try to force myself to understand that just because one person wants intimacy from the other doesn't mean it's okay to keep going when the other person doesn't. That's assault, plain and simple.