Benedict: That should be your Halloween costume. You’d look hot.
Me: It’s not about being hot, you sexist jerk.
Benedict: Whaaat? It’s sexist for me to think you’d look hot in coveralls and a bandanna?
Me: Do you even know what Rosie stands for?
Benedict: WWII icon.
Benedict: Represented women in the workforce.
Benedict: Built planes, ships, changed history.
Benedict: Carried the entire American workforce on her back.
Benedict: Total badass.
Me: Okay, fine.
Benedict: HOT.
Me: Okay, maybe it is hot.
Benedict: See? I knew you’d come around.
Benedict: Apology?
Me: I gotta go. Getting paged.
Benedict: Uh-huh. Running away from the emotional stuff. Classic Rosie move.
Me: I’m literally saving lives.
Benedict: Same. I stripped wallpaper this week that was so bad it could’ve triggered a cardiac event.
Me: Tragic.
Benedict: No, the opposite of tragic. If you’re gonna use it, use it correctly.
Me: Oh, I used it right.
A few days later . . .
Me: I just finished. 9 hours, Benedict. 9 hours.
Benedict: I didn’t know it was medically possible to spend that long inside someone’s body.
Me: Only if you have really good stamina.
Benedict: Is that a challenge? Because it sounds like a challenge.
Me: I’m super tired. What do you think?
Benedict: I’m on my way over.
Me: Don’t you dare.
Me: Are you still at the house?