Page 33 of One More Time

1983

The clown Grace had hired was busy making balloon animals, and most of the children’s faces had been painted by the tooth fairy – Jenny in a sequined dress with a pair of wings strapped to her shoulders and glitter spray all over her. Marty was manning the barbecue, handing out the last of the sausages wrapped in buttered bread with a hearty dollop of tomato sauce. Charlie had also been doing his fair share by playing party games throughout the afternoon – the kids’ favourite had been musical chairs. With her parents arriving from England for an impromptu visit, which Charlie had secretly planned to surprise her, Grace’s heart felt full to the brim, which was a nice change. All in all, it had turned out to be a wonderful day, one she’d gladly add to her memory bank.

Taking the cake box from the fridge, she watched her mother rummage through the kitchen drawers. ‘If you’re looking for a lighter, I’m guessing there’ll be one in Charlie’s coat pocket.’ Her hands full, she gestured to the coat stand with a tip of her head.

‘Really?’ Her mother straightened, brows furrowed. ‘I thought he’d quit?’

‘Me too, but I caught him sneaking one in the garden the other night.’ Grace shrugged her irritation off – today wasn’t the day for grievances. ‘I’ve given up nagging him.’

‘Argh, men! They can be so infuriating.’ Her mum’s lips tightened as her frown deepened. ‘Smoking will be the death of him if he doesn’t stop.’

‘He’s a big boy, Mum, who can make his own choices, as stupid as they might sometimes be.’ She stepped back and waved an arm over the cake. ‘Ta-da!’

‘Oh, love, it’s absolutely divine!’ Grace felt a rush of emotion as her mother wrapped an arm around her. ‘You are so clever. Hope’s a very lucky girl, having an awesome mum like you.’

‘Aw, thanks, Mum. That means a lot coming from you.’ She pecked her mother’s cheek. ‘You’re the best mama to ever walk this earth.’

Her mother blinked faster. ‘Oh, stop it, love, or you’ll make me cry. I’m an absolute sook since I got the menopause.’ Going to the jackets, she found a lighter in the third pocket she searched. ‘Voila!’ She held it up. ‘Now, let’s go make Hope’s party even happier than it already is.’

‘Yes, let’s,’ Grace said, matching her mother’s massive smile.

The guests began to gather around the table as Grace made her way across the back verandah, her latest masterpiece in hand. Carefully placing down the Minnie Mouse cake she’d spent the better part of yesterday making, she enjoyed the look of absolute delight on Hope’s face as she rose on her tippy toes to see it – she’d do anything to see such joy on her little girl’s face.

‘Here, sweetheart, why don’t you let Daddy help you up on your chair?’ Charlie’s expression was full of pride as he got Hope settled – she really was daddy’s little girl.

Loving the bond between father and daughter, Grace brushed stray locks of hair from Hope’s face. ‘Are you ready to blow your candles out, and make a wish?’

Hope clapped her hands excitedly, and her face was a picture of absolute glee as she jiggled on her chair. ‘Yippee, yes I am!’

Overcome with love, Grace cupped Hope’s cheeks and pecked her tiny lips. Their baby girl was growing up right before their eyes, way too fast for her liking. Before she knew it, she’d be waving her off to school, then university, then a life of her own and Grace would be left behind, wondering where all the years had gone, questioning if she could have done things differently and had more priceless time with her child. It made her wonder if all the hours she had to spend in the teashop were worth it. She was missing out on so much. It was funny, how priorities changed as she got older. All she’d ever wanted was to run a teashop, but motherhood had changed everything.

Nonetheless, it wasn’t something for her to ponder over right now. She’d spent plenty of time doing that this past year, and would no doubt have many more hours of deliberation in the future.

Positioning six candles, she lit each one. ‘Wait until I tell you to blow them out, okay, sweetheart?’

Hope nodded enthusiastically, her long dark ponytail swinging as she did. ‘Okay, Mummy.’

Charlie’s singsong voice enticed the rest of the guests into a rousing chorus of ‘Happy Birthday’. Moving back a little, Grace stood beside her husband, a man she loved with every fibre of her being, but at times found hard to like. Being married to a recovered alcoholic with what the doctor had described to her as ‘post traumatic stress disorder’. was a bumpy road. She kept telling herself that the worst was over and the best was yet to come, they’d be perfectly fine if only they could get through the next challenge, leap over the next hurdle … But nothing was perfect, and their marriage was far from fine. Real life was nothing like all the romance books and movies she used to have time to read and watch, then daydream over.

‘Hip, hip, hooray’ resonated around her, and she joined in wholeheartedly.

Then, camera at the ready, she nodded at Hope. ‘Okay, sweetheart, and remember to make a wish when you finish blowing.’ Hope, fists clenched as tightly as her eyes, blew with all her might and Grace clicked, capturing the sweet memory.

With all the candles out, Hope mouthed silent words, looked to the heavens, then grinned. ‘I really hope my wish for a puppy comes true.’

‘Oh, sweetheart,’ Grace chuckled.

‘You’re not supposed to tell everybody what you wished for,’ one of the little boys yelled out, laughing.

‘Oh no.’ Hope’s smile all but disappeared. ‘Does that mean I’ve ruined it?’

Grace’s heart squeezed as she shook her head. ‘No love, not at all. Just remember to keep it a secret next time.’ She helped Hope off the chair and crouched to her height. ‘Now how about you go and play with your friends while Dad and I cut the cake up?’ She straightened. ‘We’ll call out when we have it ready for you.’

‘Okay, Mummy! You’re the bestest.’ And off Hope skipped, smiling from ear to ear.

Ten minutes later, the cake was all handed out, Charlie was busy talking sports with Marty, her mum was catching up with some of Grace’s old mates who were now school mums, and Jenny had ducked off to the bathroom to de-glitter, and Grace took the chance to slip away. Her feet were aching and her headache was back. She needed to sit and have a quiet moment to herself. Rounding the corner of the house, she spotted her dad doing the exact same thing.

‘Like father like daughter, hey, Dad?’ she called over the verandah railing.