Page 5 of Road to Rosalee

‘You got that damn straight.’ He breathed a sigh. ‘Anyways, I gotta head, so get up from that god-awful desk you tie yourself to and give your brother a farewell hug.’

‘Aw. I don’t want you to go.’ Renee leapt up and threw her arms around him. ‘I’m going to miss your larrikin ways around here. Mum and Dad are so serious all the time.’

Zai held her tight. ‘I’m only a phone call away.’

Renee held him even tighter still. ‘Yeah, I know, but it’s not the same.’

Before he shed a tear, Zai untangled and stepped back, but kept hold of Renee’s hands. ‘Love you heaps, my little blister.’

‘Love you too, bro, like shit tons and then some.’

Zai mocked shock. ‘Don’t let the old man hear you use language like that beneath his roof.’

‘What he doesn’t know won’t kill him,’ she said, wiping a lone tear from her cheek as she sniffled.

‘On that note.’ He wiped the next ones that rolled from her eyes. ‘I’m outta here.’ Departing before his resolve broke, he made his way downstairs, to where his mother was enjoying her routine cup of tea and bowl of muesli at the kitchen bench at the same time as she did every day. Everything worked like clockwork here, day in, day out – it drove Zai nuts.

‘Hi, love. Sleep well?’ she asked, like she’d said every other morning he’d walked in here.

‘Yeah, can’t complain.’ He leant in to brush a kiss over her cheek. ‘How about you?’

‘I tossed and turned all night long.’ Her eyes filled with sadness as she brought a hand to his arm. ‘I wish you weren’t going back there. I hate having you so far away.’

‘Oh, come on, Mum, it’s not like you’re never going to see me again,’ he said gently.

‘I know, but it’s always so long between visits.’ She blinked faster, her sky-blue eyes a mirror of his.

‘This is the life of a stockman, Mum.’ Disregarding her look of indignation, he shrugged. ‘I have to go where the work is for as long as I can, and I’m okay with that.’ He wished to god she and his dad were.

‘Mm-hmm.’ She dropped her hand and turned away from him, focusing back on the home and design magazine she got delivered each and every month – renovating the house countless times over gave her a sense of usefulness.

His patience wearing thin, Zai drummed the counter. ‘Come on, I can see there’s more you want to say, so spill.’

She heaved an almighty sigh, resting her forearms on the breakfast bar, and turned to face him again. ‘It’s just, you could have been anything with that high IQ of yours … the world could be your oyster.’

Doing his very best to remain poker-faced, Zai breathed in deep, willing himself not to say anything he’d regret – it would be a while before he could make it up to his mum if he did. ‘I’m just following what’s in my heart.’ It was said candidly, with an undertone of annoyance.

Her lips pressed into a thin line as she took her sweet time answering him. ‘In my strong opinion, and your father’s, you should learn to follow your head. Your heart will only get you into strife.’ She eyed him, as if waiting for the match she’d just tossed to ignite into something far bigger.

‘We’ll see.’ He shrugged her gaslighting off as he headed over to the fruit bowl and grabbed an apple. ‘Dad’s already left?’ He took a bite, enjoying the tangy crunch, a small distraction.

‘Yes. He said to say goodbye.’ She sat up straighter.

‘Couldn’t pop upstairs quickly to say it himself?’ He took another bite, eyeing her as he chewed.

‘He was running late for surgery,’ she said a little defensively.

‘Pull the other one, Mum.’

‘Oh, Zai, please, not now,’ she huffed. She closed her eyes and shook her head. ‘I really don’t want you leaving on bad terms.’

She can talk. ‘Sorry, Mum, but it’s no wonder I feel like the black sheep of this family when you carry on like this.’ He strode towards her. ‘I’ve been super patient, the entire time I’ve been here, but enough’s enough.’ He paused to find the right words. ‘So how about you tell me, when are you and Dad going to accept this is what I want for my life?’

His mum regarded him with wide eyes. ‘Most probably never.’ Reaching out, she patted his cheek. ‘So how about you tell me, when are you going to accept that your father and I are just looking out for you, and only want the best for our only son?’ With that, she stood and headed to the fridge, daring a challenging glance over her shoulder when he didn’t respond. ‘Fair enough, Zai, but let me tell you, you’ll understand one day, when you’re a parent.’

Zai bit his tongue, hard. He knew from experience that self-justifying with his mother was not going to get him anywhere, but he had to at the very least say his piece. ‘I reckon I’ll accept my kids for who they are, and encourage them to do what makes them happy because you only get one shot at life, so why waste it doing something that isn’t feeding your soul?’

Jacinta Wellstone’s eyes almost rolled back in her head. ‘Oh lord, here we go again with the hoodoo guru stuff. Life isn’t all about fate and destiny and following your path, my boy. It’s about hard work and dedication and doing everything you can to be the very best you can be.’ Her manicured brows bumped together, and she folded her arms. ‘We all make choices, and you’ve chosen a path that’s not going to bring you any form of security. What kind of woman is going to marry a man who can’t provide for her, let alone a family?’