Page 55 of The Caged Viking

She hesitated, but then nodded. What other choice did she have, really?

“Even though we are wed?”

“I’m not sure that would be considered a legal marriage in my time.”

He raised his eyebrows at that argument. “And if you are with child? You would take my son or daughter to a place where I could never meet them?”

“I am not pregnant,” she stated.

“Are you certain of that?”

She could feel heat flood her cheeks. “Almost certain. Besides, if I stayed here, I might get pregnant, and then I might not ever be able to return.”

He frowned. “‘Might’ is a far cry from certain.”

“Come on, Hauk. Be honest. You don’t really want a wife.”

“Oh, I do not know about that. I admit that I once felt that way, but I have grown accustomed to your stubborn ways and high conceit. And talkative? Truly, dost have an opinion on everything, sweetling?”

She made a tsking sound of disgust. “That doesn’t sound very attractive.”

“You are attractive, believe you me. It took all my impressive self-control and raging enthusiasm,” he glanced pointedly at the bulge in his slim pants, “not to barge in whilst you were bathing and take you wet and all, mayhap against the wall, or on my lap sitting on your stool, or kneeling on the stone floor, face to face, or, wait, wait for this, better yet, both of us kneeling on the floor with me at your back, and—”

“Oh, you!” she said with a laugh, then pulled her hands out of his grasp and cupped his cheeks, giving him a quick kiss. “You are a charmer, all right.”

“But not charming enough to convince you to stay?”

“Oh, I’m tempted. Maybe if you were staying here, or near Winchester Castle where my time-travel portal is…I don’t know…maybe I would stay for a while to see where things could go.”

He stood suddenly, causing her hands to drop at her sides. He looked down at her and shrugged. “So be it,” he said. “I can’t stay. I’ve already neglected Haukshire far too long. By the time I get back there, assess how bad the situation is, go off to one of the market towns, Hedeby or Birka, to replenish stock before the winter snows come in, well, there is just not enough time. My lands are in the north…not so far as the endless daylight region…but brutal cold, just the same. And so mountainous that farming is nigh impossible; I have no plow lands to speak of. We must rely on hunting and trapping for sustenance and skins to trade, supplemented by goods purchased for provender…oats, vegetables, and such.”

“And all this takes time,” she concluded, smarting over his seeming indifference. “That time crunch thing again.”

“Yea,” he agreed. “But, most important, I think Bjorn will recover better in a secure, more quiet setting. In addition, I have a neighbor who is a threat. Last time Egil was there, Jarl Ingolf of Stormstead was seen prowling about my estates in a proprietary manner.”

He sounded so calm and rational. Did he really care so little that they might never see each other again? Meanwhile, her heart was breaking. Yes, the separation needed to happen, but that didn’t mean it would be easy. Not for her anyway.

“A stalemate then, between you and me,” she said and quickly explained, “A standstill, or impossible situation.”

“Just so we are clear…are you saying, regarding the bond between you and me, that time is the issue for you? Not enough time to know each other?”

“Basically. I mean, there are other issues, of course, which may or may not be resolved eventually, but, yes, all of it would take time. Which we don’t have.”

He nodded, as if her words confirmed something he’d already thought. “So, tonight it is then?”

“Yes,” she said. “Bjorn is getting better. The battle is over. My job is done.”

“Is it now?” He was examining his fingernails, as if to see if they needed paring. “I suppose you are right.”

She was surprised that he seemed so accepting of her departure. While her heart felt like it was breaking, Hauk seemed resigned to her leaving, maybe a little relieved. They hadn’t made love since the one night in the tent, and no opportunity to repeat that experience while here at Winchester with four of them crammed in one room, one of them almost dying. That meant they wouldn’t have any opportunity before tonight, either.

Unless…

“So, this is good-bye,” she said casually, then slanted him what she hoped was a sultry invitation. “You know what you said about what you could do with me on your lap?”

A smile slowly emerged on his lips.

* * *