Page 130 of The Gods Forbid

Ariana’s face paled, draining of blood, but there was still a great deal of rage in her eyes. “I see your parents had their worst fears realized. You were nothing they hoped you’d be.”

“That’s a good thing,” I bit out, wrenching my wrists out of Sebastian’s hands. Before I could step around him, he cut me off with his massive form again.

“Go away, Ariana,” he all but growled. “For good.”

With a haughty sniffle, Ariana stepped to the side. For a second, I thought she’d simply walk away, but she stopped next to me, leaning close. “I’m pleased to have met you,” she said, with false joy in her voice. “How illuminating this conversation has been.”

“Ariana,” Sebastian snapped.

With a smile, she held her hands up and walked away, leaving me heaving and angry. Now I really needed to leave.

Sebastian placed a hand on my shoulder, making my gaze snap up to his. If I was angry, he looked livid. He opened his mouth, surely to tell me I’d crossed a line, but just then, someone said, “Lord Apollo, I had to tell you what a wonderful night this has been.”

Sebastian looked seconds away from snapping fuck off. Rather than doing so, he graciously turned to the person who’d spoken and said, “Thank you.”

While he did, I took the opportunity to step away from him, making his hand drop from my shoulder. He was trapped in this conversation, unable to leave without appearing unduly rude to a kind patron.

It was the opening I needed to flee. With a smile at the patron, I walked away, seeking a dark corner as quickly as possible.

I gathered a portal the second I was alone, dropping right into my studio. I didn’t even bother going to the house to change, walking immediately to the piano in the middle of the room.

I needed to be alone, and this was the only place I could have it.

I needed a distraction, and this was the only way I could get it.

My fingers settled on the keys, finding a song that sounded as painful as the hurt in my chest. The second my body was busy, my mind took off.

Sebastian was leaving.

I was staying here, in my corner of the world, while he went out there and shone like the sun.

This was what I was supposed to want. It was what everyone else wanted. For me to fix him and for him to return to his pinnacle of power, showering in everyone’s love and adoration.

I bet he even—

I had to shake my head to force the thought out. Thank goodness I didn’t attend many events or read the news. If I had to see first hand how he interacted with women out in public, I would … well, the only thing that sounded appealing after an image like that would be to punch something, then cry.

I could feel my fingers pressing harder into the keys, trying desperately to distract my mind.

Sebastian would leave and never look back. He’d said it himself countless times, he couldn’t imagine staying this far away from the sun.

That’s what he focused on. The lack of it. No mattered how hard I wished for him to view it the other way, to fixate on the extra minutes of sunlight we’d been getting every day. Even if it was probably explained away by some fluke of the seasons or nature—though Prometheus was affected by neither in any normal way—I wanted to shake him and make him stay.

He never would. And I could never ask. Not when this was half-imagined in my head.

That was deeply insane. Imagining asking a man who you haven’t even kissed, who probably views you as nothing more than his jailer, to voluntarily give up a piece of his power because you’re pretty sure you’ve accidentally fallen in love with him.

The music stopped abruptly, almost out of my own control as my head fell into my hands to catch my tears. A violent sob wracked my body, sending a horrible clang of notes through the room.

Ugh, he made me so angry. It was like my body wasn’t big enough to contain any emotion I felt towards him.

At the end of this, he was just going to leave me to deal with all of it by myself.

It was cruel.

And yet it wasn’t. Not really, because true cruelty required someone to want to hurt you. He didn’t have to apologize for not loving me or for wanting to run for the hills the second these six months were over.

I could do nothing but bow under the weight of it, trying not to go insane from the force. I let myself cry, allowed myself that much, before I tried to put on a brave face. I needed to let it out somehow.