Page 119 of Wild Abandon

He takes another step closer. “Life is too short, and I refuse to spend one more minute without being with the one person I want by my side. I want you to be the first person I kiss in the morning and the last person I see before I close my eyes at night.”

He comes even closer. His body is so close to mine that I can feel the heat of his body. “It’s not going to be easy,” he continues. “I come as a package deal. I made a vow to Ellie, and for as long as she’s alive, I will forever care for her. I also have a big, smelly dog and medical bills. But, in return, I promise to love you, cherish you, support you, and worship you for the rest of my life. I will even let you get a cat.”

The line makes me laugh, and a little bit of the tension is broken. I look back up at him, and his eyes are softer, lovingly looking down at me.

He says, “I can’t change my past, but I’m done letting the future write itself for me. I want you in my life forever, and I want the rest of my life to start right now.”

I let out a cry, an exhale-type cry where your throat makes a strange noise, but I can’t control it. Nate just said the one thing I’ve wanted so bad that it’s hard to say yes.

Still, I shake my head.

“How, Nate? Where would we live? What about Ellie and Ed? It’s all too complicated.” My eyes dart back and forth around the floor as I think of all the ways this could go terribly wrong.

Nate slightly bows down to catch my gaze, our contact intense. “It is complicated. But we always were from the start. I want you to come back to Napa with me. I put my apartment in San Francisco up for sale. It’s time to let go.” He must see the surprise on my face because he tucks a curl behind my ear and holds my head in his hand. “We’ll get our own place. You pick it. All I care about is that it’s somewhere in between Ellie and Russet Ranch.”

I shake my head. “I can’t go back to working at the ranch. What will Ed think of me after he finds out we’re together?”

Nate just smiles a beautiful smile, and that chipped tooth is visible through the brilliance of it. “He’ll think you’re in love with the owner.”

I push away, confused by that very odd statement.

Nate pulls me back and inches his mouth very close to mine. “The vineyard is mine. Ed signed it over to me, just as Old Man Russet had done for him. Signed the papers yesterday. I am going to bring it back to life, and I want to do it with you by my side. I want to raise a family with you and grow old and sit in rockers, drinking wine and telling our grandkids about the time you stripped for me in my living room.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“No, but I will show them a certain music video.” He laughs, and I go to hit him, but he stops me by pulling me in and kissing me.

Should I say no to him?

Yes, I should. My brain is telling my hands to push away from him and to ask him to leave.

Nate is married to someone else. His vow is to another woman. I will forever wonder if he wished to trade me in for the life he had originally chosen.

Yet, kissing him, in this moment, there is a thought more frightening taking over my heart. I have been married once. I loved before. Nothing has ever—nothing will ever measure up to the way I feel about him and the way he makes me feel when he’s around.

I’d rather live a half-life with Nate than not live with him at all.

Nate kisses me like his yesterday, today, and tomorrow are all tied up into one kiss, like I’m his forever. And I kiss him back like he is mine. Because he is.

It’s complicated, it’s messy, and it’s far from perfect. But, damn, it is the only life I ever want to live.

I pull away from Nate and look up into his beautiful face. “Take me home, Nate.”

“I already have your ticket.”

EPILOGUE

NATE

The sun is beating down, and sweat is dripping on my back. It’s a good day at Russet Ranch.

We produce four tons of grapes per acre and make high-quality wine only found in this part of the valley. We host five tastings a day, catering exclusively to tour groups, and sell a special reserve to a few high-end restaurants in the region.

Business has been good, and life has been even better.

“All right, boys, time to bring her in!” I call to my crew for the end of the day.

We have migrant workers at the ranch and a couple of yearly guys. I could sit back and let them handle the manual labor, but what’s the fun in that? This is what I was made for. This is the work I love.