Page 17 of No Fear

“Nah. Steve’s a die-hard Sox fan. Just rubbing it in.”

“How are you, son?” The tone of his father’s voice made him put the phone down.

“I’m good. Why?”

“I’m not blind, James. Charlie showing up got to you. I know being here brings up memories of Nate. I guess even after all these years, it’s still hard on you.”

No kidding. “Yeah, it’s hard.”

“Why didn’t you ever reach out to her? Your mom’s right. The three of you were close.”

Donnie sighed. “I couldn’t. Seeing her was too painful a reminder of Nate.” It was partly the truth.

“She missed you. Used to come around, wanting to know if we knew where you were, how you were doing. I know you were hurting son and grieving in your own way. Charlie was too. It’s been ten years. Isn’t it time you made amends? You two could barely look at each other earlier. It seems such a shame when you were the two people closest to Nate.”

Donnie swallowed down the lump in his throat. “Maybe it’s better this way. She’s getting married. Starting a new life. I bring bad memories, and she doesn’t need that.”

“How do you know what she needs? You and Nate were like brothers. Nate loved Charlie, and I’m sure he would have wanted you to be there for her.”

Donnie took a swig of his beer and avoided his father’s gaze, not wanting him to see his guilt.

The ball game ended with the Yankees winning, six nothing. His dad stood, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“I didn’t mean to get heavy. You’re a grown man and can make your own choices. It is really good to see you and you made your mom’s day today.”

Donnie smiled. “It’s good to be here.”

“Alright, I am going to go and see my birthday girl. I will see you in the morning.”

“Goodnight, Dad.”

Donnie stared at the television screen but had no idea what was on it. The image of Charlie’s pained face taunted him. He had known she would be upset at him leaving, but he’d convinced himself she would get over him quickly and move on. He had underestimated just how hurt she would be. Damn, it was unforgivable. He had a few days; maybe his dad was right. It was time to lay the past to rest. He needed to apologize properly. Neither of them were kids anymore. They were adults. He was a goddamn special operator. He could protect Charlie from the truth and make amends. It was time.

***

“HE HAD NOTHING ELSE to say? I could kick Donnie’s ass.” Maddie handed her another glass of wine. Charlie had gone home to see her folks for a couple of hours but then headed straight to Maddie’s for some much needed girl time. The two women sat in Maddie’s back yard enjoying the sunset, while Dave took care of the kids' bath and bedtime.

“He wanted to talk. But I... couldn't.” Tears welled up again.

“Oh, honey. Don’t.”

Maddie sat beside her on the small garden’s padded bench and pulled her into a hug.

“I don’t know why I’m so upset. I mean, it’s been ten years. I’m getting married.” Charlie swiped at her tears in frustration.

“He was the first boy you kissed. You cared for him, and he left at the worst time of your life. Of course, you’re upset,” Maddie said reasonably. “How long is he in town for?”

“I don’t know. Couple of days, I think.”

“And how about you? I mean it’s always great to see you, but this was a surprise. I thought you were going to Canada?”

“I am.” She sighed and picked up her wine. “Simon is working on this big deal. I thought I would give him some space. I’m only passing through on my way to Toronto.”

“You two have a fight?”

“No. Not really.” She told Maddie about what Simon had said about her work and how things would change when they were married. “It’s all just a misunderstanding. When I get back, we’ll talk and work it all out.”

Maddie was frowning as Charlie sipped her wine. When she didn’t speak, Charlie frowned too. “What? It’s the truth.”