Page 33 of Dancing With Guilt

“I know, that’s why I thought a bigger place might be better.” That and she wouldn’t have to see Nick if she wasn’t here, he thought. But then another thought struck. “Um, what if I find somewhere else and you go to my place with them?”

“Oh.” Roxie leaned against the couch, took a sip of her wine, and then stared down into the glass. “She’d be used to your house by then. The only change would be you’d come to stay later, and I’d leave.”

“Yes,” Lincoln said, trying to ignore how sad it made him to hear that she’d leave again. That had been his choice, though, hadn’t it? Even if he did regret it now.

“That would work.” Roxie nodded and looked up from her wine finally. “I’ll talk to Aunt Katie in the morning.”

“Good. I guess I’ll be off then.” He stood up, looked around one last time, and put his hands in his pockets. “You’ll call me tomorrow?”

“Yeah, sure.” Roxie didn’t move from the couch, she just took another sip of her wine, staring out towards the balcony. For a moment, Lincoln wanted to go over, take the glass from her, throw it against the wall and pull her into his arms. He wanted to tell her he’d made a huge mistake and he regretted it. But she was in another man’s condo, and clearly didn’t want him near her. She hadn’t even moved to walk him out the door.

She was still upset. He’d have to live with that.

“Alright, talk to you then.” He opened the door, ready to go, but he stopped and turned back to her before he closed it. “Good night, Roxie.”

“Good night, Lincoln.” He heard her say but she didn’t look up.

He’d hurt her deeply, and now they were both living with the consequences.

She’d looked so lonely, leaning against that couch, he almost went back in to beg her to forgive him. But maybe she’d moved on. Nick had been there when he’d arrived earlier, had he stayed the night with her?

Lincoln couldn’t see her having a man over when her daughter had only just arrived, but what did he know? Maybe she needed the comfort the other man could give her.

Lincoln wanted to smash something but knew it wouldn’t accomplish anything. And he’d end up in jail if that something was Nick’s smug face. The bastard.

The house was dark - he’d forgotten to leave any lights on when he left earlier - and far too quiet to be comfortable. Lincoln turned on some music and opened a bottle of beer once he’d changed into some pajamas. Sitting at the kitchen table, he opened his laptop and started looking for a short-term rental property.

If Lily needed some time to get to know him, he’d give it to her. He might know nothing about being a father, but he knew a lot about how to not treat a child. She’d get love, attention, and respect from him for the rest of her life. If that meant he had to rent out a place for himself for a little while so she could get used to his house, so be it.

For a moment, he thought about telling Roxie that he wanted to stay, that she should just come over for a little while and go back to her place once Lily was settled in. But that would backfire in an instant. There were too many memories of happier times in the house. Memories that would complicate the situation more than it already was.

16

Roxie

“So, she’s out with Lincoln now?” Wendy asked as she helped Roxie pack up her stuff to take to Lincoln’s.

“Yeah, he offered to take her to his house while I got everything packed. Aunt Katie is with them,” Roxie answered automatically, her mind a million miles away.

“What’s wrong?” Wendy asked from the door of the bathroom, staring out as Roxie folded clothes and put them in a suitcase instead of the dryer.

“I guess it’s Lincoln, in general. I messed up and he won’t forgive me. I can’t blame him, really,” Roxie replied, putting one of Lily’s dresses in the suitcase. “Now, I have to go live in his house again. Do you realize how many times I’ve moved in the last few months? And I still have the apartment.”

“I wish I could help. Do you need me to bring anything from the apartment? I know you may end up back there, but just in case, do you want me to bring anything?”

Roxie smiled for the first time since Lincoln picked up Lily and Katie earlier that day. “Yeah, actually, I do. There’s a secret hiding space in the floor, I have a few things in there, a note, some lip gloss, I’d like to have with me. They’re just mementos, but I don’t want to lose them.”

“Notes and lip gloss? What’s that about?” Wendy asked, going back to placing toiletries in a plastic shopping bag.

“It’s just stuff from my childhood,” Roxie answered vaguely, on purpose. She didn’t want to talk about it and Wendy let it go, thankfully.

“I swear, I’m moving in there when you finally do move out,” Wendy joked, but Roxie had to wonder if she actually meant it. “You know, I think you’d be safe if you moved back in there.”

Wendy let the words trail off and Roxie looked at her with a puzzled look. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I have a connection. There’s someone watching the place all the time now.”

“I’m aware of the under-the-table stuff that happens at Lemon Fresh, Wendy. It’s one of the reasons I chose the place. It’s like there’s this invisible force protecting the place because of whatever business it is your parents are involved in.” Roxie shrugged, then went on. “It’s a force not to be messed with and I’m sure your parents stepped up security since all the shit with Nathan happened.”