Page 17 of Housekeeping

My face felt a little hot. “Sorry. It’s been a while for me.”

“Oh?” His eyebrows shot up. “How long is a while?”

I opened my mouth to reply but realized I didn’t have a ready answer. How long had it been anyway? More than a year, maybe? I remember getting dumped a long while before last Christmas, and the year was getting on, so nearly.

“A while,” I said. No need to go into detail.

He didn’t press for more, instead he leaned down for another kiss that I melted right into. After a long, passionate kiss that left my body yearning towards his, I pressed my hands to his chest so he’d let me breathe again.

“Are we ever going to move away from the door?” I asked breathlessly.

Mason grinned at me, then pulled away. He took my hand again and pulled me further into the room. He pulled me over to the couch, directed me to sit down, then sat right next to me, body shifted to the side a little, so he was facing me.

I didn’t fight it when he went in for another kiss. We’d already had dinner and conversation. Right then, I only wanted the one thing from him, and as he was pushing me back into the arm of the couch and lying his athletic body over mine, I was all for it. I reacted with enthusiasm, in fact, throwing one of my legs over his, my fingers burying in his hair to hold him to me as I kissed him back with as much passion as he was giving me.

He nibbled on my lower lip, making me moan. His tongue slid into my mouth, tangling around mine, and I sucked on it. Mason let out a growl that ran a shiver down my back, pressing me further into the couch. When he pulled away again, I was lying down on my back, my legs thrown over his, and he was half kneeling on the couch with his upper body braced above me, one hand on the arm of the couch.

Mason didn’t slow down, moving to kiss his way down my neck. His other hand went to my waist, flexing a little as he slowly, seductively moved it up.

That was where I got scared, and I put a hand over his to stop him. It was enough to get him to freeze completely. He slowly pulled back to meet my eyes, his own full of questions. Suddenly feeling awkward again, I looked away from his gaze.

“What is it?” he asked, his voice in a whisper.

I sighed, pushing against his chest some more. He moved until he was sitting properly, and I shifted my legs from over his to do the same. I fixed my slightly mussed clothes, my hands on my knees.

“Did I do something wrong?” he asked quietly, after a minute of silence.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s just that… I don’t usually do this sort of thing.”

“Having sex?” he responded, his tone incredulous.

I let out a snort at that. “No, not that. I’m not a virgin, Mason. I just… don’t do one-night stands. Usually, I date guys before I sleep with them. I want to do this though,” I added quickly, so he didn’t think I was asking him to date me. “It’s just…”

As I went to explain, my voice trailed off. Usually, I dated guys to gauge their reactions to when we both wanted something more out of the relationship. It had taken a while for me to grow comfortable with my body the way it was because while my scars were a mark I would have to live with for the rest of my life, they were also a mark that I’d escaped death once, so it was a big thing.

Still, I wasn’t so comfortable that I would let just anyone look at me so exposed. I might have got my life back on track; I was able to carry on happily like I hadn’t had a bad experience in my life. That didn’t mean I would be okay with people judging my body, and it was why I didn’t date that much. I was in my mid-thirties, and I’d dated maybe five guys, and one of them was before the whole cancer thing. Of the remaining four, only three ever made it to my bed. One of those relationships lasted over a year, but we still broke up. He was the guy who’d left me last year because he’d fallen for someone else.

I could be fine with everything else in my life, but over this, I couldn’t be so carefree. I didn’t like that I was so self-conscious because it was something I hadn’t had before, but it wasn’t something about me that I could easily change either.

“There’s something you should know…”

Mason arched an eyebrow at me. He didn’t dismiss me though. He sat back and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Go ahead, Laura. I’m all ears.”