Page 97 of Reckless Desires

“Oh…” Serafina’s voice trails off.

“Oh, what?” I ask, observing her face.

“That’s what I came up here for.” Serafina starts picking at her nail. “He’s here. For you.”

“Wait, what?” I ask.

“Should I tell him to go?”

“No.” I shake my head, getting off the bed. “We’ve been long-time friends, so he’s just checking on me.”

“Right…” Serafina’s voice trails off again. “About that… Maisie may have also seen Cameron’s phone and thoughts on asking whether you’d marry him if he asks.”

By Stasia’s and Selene’s reactions, I know they were already aware. I start pacing, thinking back to Killian saying there’s more to a woman than producing an heir, and knowing how much Alessio has always liked me, then my infertility shouldn’t be an issue. Right? Then something deeper starts to gnaw at me.

“You want to walk us through what’s going on in your head?” Stasia voices, as my sisters watch me.

I stop to look at them. “Did it bother either of you that Dad wasn’t around for Darius or Cameron to ask for your hand in marriage?”

The weight of the question shocks both my older sisters.

“It hurt even more that he wasn’t there to walk me down the aisle,” Selene replies softly. “Both times.”

Stasia is tearing up. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her be so emotional. “There are plenty of things he’s going to miss.” She grabs Serafina and pulls her into a hug, placing a kiss on her head. “But we have each other. Sisters for life. Nothing and no one can change that.”

“Mom is going to be pissed,” I reply. “She should be part of this.”

“You mean the one that’s away on vacation again?” Serafina speaks up, getting off the bed, sticking her hip out to the side and placing her hand on it. “Lily, I know you and Mom have always been close—you’re practically her protégé—but even I see she uses you like an accessory.”

Both Stasia and Selene take a deep breath and look at one another. Hearing this kind of thing from them, I let it go in one ear and out the other, but to hear Serafina thinks the same really sinks in.

“She just wants to make sure we end up taken care of,” I reply, almost ashamed of defending her. “You know she loves us all. Shows it differently to each of us but loves us the same.”

“People who say they love you but don’t fix what hurts you, don’t love you. They love the comfort of having you. Love without effort is just an illusion,” Serafina replies. “She had Stasia basically raise us. She made sure Selene married Sal for the title. She dictated your life so you would walk in her footsteps. And when I told her I wanted to take over the family bakery, she was happy, but not because I was keeping it alive, but because she expects to get a cut of the profit.”

I gulp. Serafina has had her heart and eyes set on running the bakery since Dad’s passing. She works it. Stasia taught her the books, and Selene helps her with inventory; never once has Mom helped.

I let out a sigh then look to Serafina. “I didn’t know you felt that way about her.”

“Just sometimes she’s too much. Too pushy. And is only nice when she gets something out of it,” Serafina replies.

Stasia tries to clear the rising smoke. “Lily, you have a really good guy downstairs who cares about you and wants to marry you.” She walks toward me. “I don’t want you to say yes unless you truly want this.”

Chapter Sixty-Four

Killian

Ilean against the cool metal of my car, the engine idling softly as I watch Lily through the windshield. It’s a bright afternoon, and the sun casts a halo around her, making her look ethereal as she walks out of a yoga studio. I told myself that I’m only here to keep her safe, to ensure she doesn’t get caught up in the chaos I’m trying to escape. Nico will try to get his hands on her, and I don’t trust Alessio to keep her safe.

But deep down, there’s a yearning that twists in my gut—I miss her. God, how I miss her. Even trying to keep myself busy is no help. My home feels empty. Mo chuisle—my pulse—is gone. She first got under my skin out of irritation, but then her presence grew on me, making my pulse constantly beat faster. I didn’t realize the impact she had on me was so strong. Or maybe I did and knew it would be my downfall. Izzy’s dream has been glued to the back of my head since we left Ireland.

It has been almost a month since I’ve last seen Lily, and in that time, I have convinced myself that I’m just lonely. But watching her now, with a bright smile and that familiar bounce in her step, I feel the walls I built around my heart start to crack. The way she laughs, the way she moves. Everything about her is magnetic. But it’s the glint of metal on her finger that catches my breath and sends a chill through me.

A ring.

A large diamond ring. She is engaged. And I know exactly who she will be marrying.

This hits me like a punch to the gut. I force myself to breathe, to focus. This isn’t about me; it’s about her safety. I watch Lily as she chats with another female outside of the studio, her laughter bright against the mundane backdrop of the city. She looks like she’s doing well, managing her demons. That is, until she turns to walk away and her smile drops like a mask.