Page 119 of Unscripted

I was about to ask more, but at that moment there was a knock on the door, followed by Harry poking his head in.

“I’m sorry girls, but you all needed to have started glam five minutes ago,” he said.

“We’ll do ours in here,” Ella replied, getting up off the ground and leveling Harry with a stare that would have cracked anyone’s resolve.

Harry just shrugged his shoulders and turned back into the hallway as though he had expected her mandate.

Climbing up off the floor, I looked between Chiara and Ella. No matter what happened next, at least I had them. My worst-case scenario came true, and yet they were still here, standing by my side.

My self-reflection was interrupted by a gaggle of stylists, makeup artists, sound techs, and producers filing into the room. Girl time would have to wait.

I was ushered into a chair, my face and hair descended on by the professionals. All the while, Chiara and Ella chatted away on either side of me, never once pausing, never once giving me time to spiral into my own world of anxiety.

And then we were ready, hair made up and makeup painted on. I had kept my hair down, opting for loose waves instead of anything more complex. Slipping on the dress that had been picked out for me, I couldn’t help but laugh.

It was red. The exact same shade as the dress I wore when I first stepped into the villa.

This time, though, the shape was completely different: a gorgeous satin empire waist mini with delicate straps. It was less clingy, less stretchy and sexy and anything remotely Bella Amore, than my first red dress. This was chic and classic and, most importantly, I felt great in it.

I thought back to that first day in the villa, right before I walked in and my life changed. Just like that moment, I would use my wardrobe as armor.

I can do this.

I could walk onto that stage and face Callum, Gemma, and the world. I would be fine. I would be okay.

I had to be.

“Five minutes to stage, ladies,” Harry called out as he poked his head into the dressing room. He eyed me up and down and gave me a wink. “You look smashing,” he said.

I winked back at him, trying to will his lightness into my own demeanor.

Taking a deep breath, I turned to Chiara and Ella. Without saying a word, they each grabbed one of my hands, and we stood in a circle, taking in a final moment of calm.

“We’ll be with you the entire time,” Ella said.

“Every step of the way,” Chiara echoed.

And they were.

We walked, hand in hand, out of the room and to set.

The live studio audience went silent for a moment when I stepped foot on stage. Quickly, though, the buzz of their whispers filled the space. Keeping my shoulders back and my chin up, I didn’t look over to the risers where they were all seated. I kept my focus on putting one foot in front of the other until I was stepping up onto set and sitting on the loveseat that had a piece of paper with my name on it taped to the back.

Ella and Chiara took their seats to my right, next to Liam and Alfie. Glancing around, I realized that everyone was seated with their match. Everyone except me.

I looked down at the empty space beside me. Callum’s name was stuck on the back of the couch, same as mine, but he wasn’t here. As the minutes ticked away and the last of the cast flooded onto set, he still wasn’t here. Through sound checks, a whole entrance rehearsal for Gemma, and last looks by hair and makeup, the spot next to me remained empty.

Ella had been right; Callum was missing in action.

If I hadn’t been so pissed at him for leaving me to clean up our mess alone, I would have been worried about his wellbeing.

Instead, I had to steel myself for what was ahead. As a producer behind camera began to count down the moments until we were live, I focused on my breathing, on sitting up straight, on keeping my legs crossed tightly together and not adding another scandal to my running list.

And then, the little light on top of the center camera turned red and we were rolling, broadcasting live to the British public.

Gemma entered from a catwalk that had been built just for the occasion, sashaying her way down it, twirling and waving to the audience, playing her part perfectly. Stopping in the middle of the set, she waited for the cheers to quiet down before introducing the show to the viewers both in the studio and at home.

“Welcome, to the Bella Amore Live Reunion! We’ve got a great show for you, all of your favorite, and maybe not so favorite, Bellas are here and ready to rehash their summer of love. But first, let’s take a look back at how we got to this point.” She nodded at the camera, holding her smile for a minute until a producer called, “Clear for video playback.”