Page 27 of A Bond So Deadly

“Feel better?” Thane rumbles, his shadows tangling with mine.

I smile. “Yes, daddy.”

This time his eyes flash with irritation at the nickname, and he punishes me by giving me a bruising kiss.

I grin when he pulls back, only to find he’s smiling as well.

“Good,” he growls.

“How long do you think it will be until the pain returns?” Knox asks.

I shrug. “I have no idea.”

Thane’s dark brows lower, and he shares a look with Knox. “We have to make sure someone’s always there for her.”

My heart skitters. “You mean like…”

“To ensure we always meet your needs,” Knox answers seriously.

A stupid grin crawls onto my face. Holy crap. Is this really happening? “Well, they do say an orgasm a day keeps the doctor away,” I joke. I know I should be focusing on the fact that the pain could come back at any time, but they’re discussing giving me orgasms as if they’re talking about scheduling regular medicine doses, and it’s hard not to feel giddy. Blake is going to freak out when she hears this. Except…I realize I can’t tell Blake. If I do, then she’ll find out about the unexplained painful episodes, and I’ve worried her enough for one day.

Both of my mates stare at me.

“Don’t you mean an apple a day?” Knox asks. “I’m certain that’s what the saying is.”

I beam at him. “Well, if you ask me, it should be orgasms instead of apples, because I feel much better.”

Chuckling, Thane spreads his hand possessively on my thigh as he moves in closer.

Knox closes in on my other side, his muscled chest pressing against my arm, and I let out a long sigh, relieved to be pain-free again.

Everything is messed up, but somehow, in their arms, I feel safe. In their arms, I feel like I could be trapped at Shadowbone for a thousand years and still not get enough of them. Frequent orgasms? Yes, please. I send out a mental thank you to Lady Fate, but deep down, I know the pain isn’t a good sign. If anything, it feels like a warning. Like the pain is an alarm that keeps going off, reminding me that my time is almost up. Stop being silly, Shade, that’s not what it means. It’s just the fated mates connection trying to get you together. Only, I’ve never heard of pain ever being a symptom of those experiencing the effects of a fated mates connection.

I’m not sure how much time passes before I doze off, but when I wake it’s still dark outside. Thane is sleeping, but Knox remains awake. His fingers trace soft lines on my arms, but his brow is furrowed and he stares into the darkness of the room like he has the entire world on his mind.

When he notices me watching, his lips curve into a smile. “Sleep, my love. Don’t worry, no nightmares will bother you. I’ll never let them torment you again.” There’s a dark look in his eyes when he says it, and I don’t at all doubt that he means that.

“That’s tempting,” I reply softly. “But please don’t.”

His frown deepens.

“Don’t shield me from my nightmares tonight,” I say. I think of all the memories swirling around in my head, and the blank spots I have yet to fill. “I know there’s something important I’m still missing. And there’s one memory in particular that shaped who I am, but every time I try to grasp for it, it’s like it floats away out of reach. I guess I’m hoping…”

“That you’ll find the answers in your dreams?” he finishes for me. “In your nightmares?”

“Yeah.” I know deep down that whatever memory is missing, it’s something I tried to bury and forget, even before Queen Krosia cursed me and wiped my memories. Something happened that was so bad I tried to mentally erase it from my mind. And now I’m the stupid one trying to force myself to remember. A part of me knows I should leave it alone. That maybe I should be grateful I can’t remember, but curiosity has me wondering. I know if I don’t figure this out, I’ll never feel whole.

Knox and I stare at each other for a moment, and I think of the time we’d been together before the shadow queen’s curse. He’d sensed the nightmares lurking in my dreams. He’d asked me about them multiple times back then, and I’d refused to tell him. I remember wanting so badly to just forget them. But now I have to know what was so horrible in my past that I’d felt like I was drowning in darkness.

Knox must be able to read my emotions because he doesn’t fight it. “If that’s what you wish, mate,” he tells me simply. “But I won’t let you be consumed by them. The moment you call, I’ll be there.”

Lifting my hand, I link my fingers with his. “Thanks,” I say softly. I know I need to face whatever dark part of me is still buried, but I’m glad I don’t have to face it alone.

Sleep takes me quickly after that, and I fall into my dreams. The sensation reminds me of a scene from one of my favorite children’s books where the main character falls down a rabbit hole, though this is not nearly as exciting. I’m falling into darkness, fragments of memories passing by me as I sink into the abyss of my mind. I glimpse snapshots of my life. A photo of the car accident that killed my parents when I was young. An image of the public high school that I barely survived. A picture of the local library that was my safe haven.

It feels like I’m falling forever, but then it all stops, and dread crawls over me as a black-and-white scene materializes.

Blood.