Page 66 of Tito

Tito

Hap leaned forward and peered past me. After a moment of going unnoticed, he cleared his throat. “What do you do with your spare time?”

Seated between Braxton and me, Reggie leaned forward. “Are you talking to me?”

“Well, I’m sure as shit not talking to my son,” Hap growled playfully. “And you can see what my neighbor does with his spare time, he’s doing it right now. Yes, dear, I’m talking to you.”

“Oh.” She smiled. Let’s see. I run. I read quite a bit. I play the online crosswords from the LA Times and the Tribune. I don’t know. I guess that’s about it, really.”

Hap relaxed. He processed her reply for a moment. Then, he leaned forward. “Play any games other than crosswords?”

“No,” Reggie replied. “Not really.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know. I guess it’s because I don’t have anyone to play with.”

Hap stood and walked past Reggie and me. He handed Braxton his empty bottle. After receiving a fresh one in return, he faced Reggie. He took a drink, giving a quick look-over in the process. “But you’re not opposed to it? If there were willing participants?”

“Playing games with others?” She laughed. “No. I’m not a snob, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Didn’t peg you for a snob.” He sipped his beer. “I was more concerned with your willingness to play games.”

She glanced in my direction.

I shrugged. “I have no idea where he’s going with this.”

She looked at Hap. “I’m willing.”

Hap lifted his chin slightly. “Ever heard of fuck, marry, kill?”

“Oh, yeah! This is going to be fun.” She rubbed her hands together feverishly. “Alex Rodriguez, Jake Gyllenhaal, and Tony Stark. Whatever that guy’s name is. I can’t ever remember it.”

“Robert Downey Junior,” Braxton said.

“Yeah, that’s him.” She glanced at each of us. “Who goes first?”

“I don’t fuck men,” Hap huffed.

“Well,” Reggie said. “I don’t fuck women.”

Hap rubbed his jaw. “Didn’t give this much thought.”

“I’d fuck Rodriguez, Kill Gyllenhaal, and marry Iron Man,” Braxton said dryly.

Reggie glanced to her left. “Why Iron Man?”

“He’s the oldest,” Braxton replied. “He’ll die sooner than the others, leaving me to inherit his fortune. And, after seeing Nightcrawler, Gyllenhaal gives me the creeps. I couldn’t fuck that guy or marry him. I think I’d toss him in the lion den at the San Diego Zoo. Process of elimination leaves Rodriguez and Iron Man. Iron Man’s the clear winner.”

“Rodriguez and Iron Man have comparable net worth,” Reggie said. “If that makes a difference.”

Braxton tilted his beer bottle toward Reggie and grinned. “I’ll stick with Iron Man.”

“I’m not playing this round,” Hap whined. “I can’t bring myself to fuck a man, and I’m damned sure not marrying one. I’d kill all three of those bastards, but we’ve deemed in previous games that such violent acts are unacceptable.”

Reggie looked at me. “Do you play this often?”

I nodded. “Hap enjoys it.”