Page 23 of Reality Girl, Ep. 3

Chapter Eight

While Eric shoveleda dozen eggs and two containers of yogurt down his throat, I explained my plan.

“I try to hit on you, acting like I’m wanting to hook up. You brush me off every time, but I keep coming back, hoping you’ll change your mind. You’re not a dick about it, you’re just, I don’t know. You lack interest. You brush me off, always making an excuse.”

His eyes were fixed on his plate, and his fork was going a hundred miles an hour.

Assuming he heard me, and that he simply chose to eat eggs instead of giving confirmation, I continued. “I don’t like dicks, so don’t be a dick, okay? Maybe you can give me some spiel about how you never hook up with chicks until you know them. Yeah, that’ll be even better. Make up some long drawn out explanation about how you’ve never hooked up with a chick, and you’ve got to love them first. Then, when you hook up with the chicks from the bar, they’ll be like, that son-on-a-bitch lied to her.”

He looked up, nodded, and went back to eating.

“Are you even listening?”

He shoveled the yellow gobs into his mouth. “Uh huh.”

I wanted him to pay attention to me. His inattentive nature during the planning stage left me wondering just how well we’d pull it off when the time came. I needed it to be believable, or Kelli would throw a fit.

“Dude. Finish eating and pay attention, okay? This is important.”

He wagged his eyebrows and forked another clump into his open gob. I hoped the remaining men were just as lacking in the personality department as he was. If that were the case, denying them would come easy.

After finishing his eggs, he inhaled the two tubs of yogurt, ate three pieces of toast, then pushed himself away from the counter. He crossed his arms, and gazed down at his empty plate and grinned.

“Don’t tell me,” I said. “Now you’ve got to go work out?”

He shook his head. “Already did.”

“Are you ready to listen?”

“Yep.”

“You going to act like you’re not interested in having sex with me. You can explain in this longwinded story about how you’ve never hooked up with a girl, and how you believe in love being the predecessor to sex or something like that. But you’ll be nice to me. Can you do that?”

“Uh huh.”

When people categorized guys at the gym as being meatheads, I was sure they were talking about men like Eric. He was handsome, muscular, and had a massive cock. In most women’s eyes, based on looks alone, he would be the perfect man.

Beyond the surface, however, he was simple-minded and without so much as a grain of personality.

I mentally rolled my eyes and looked at him in disbelief. “So, you’re good with this? You think you can pull it off?”

“Uh huh.”

My eyes thinned. I had my doubts, but I guessed time would tell. We could film it, re-do it, and continue to re-do it until he got it right. I’d already learned that what actually happens and what is seen on television are two totally different things.

“There’s another thing,” I said.

“What’s that?”

“You’ve got no game.”

He gave me a confused look. “What do you mean?”

“In the bedroom. You just…” I put my hands on my waist and then moved my hips back and forth while my eyes roamed around the kitchen aimlessly. With my hips still gyrating, I fixed my gaze on the refrigerator. “Oh, cool. Look, a refrigerator.”

His eyebrows raised. “What do you expect?”

I leaned onto the edge of the counter and grinned. “Girls like it when guys are vocal during sex. There’s a lot of ways to do it, and none of them are wrong. What one girl likes, another might not. You can figure out what they like by talking to them while you’re fucking them. Kind of test the waters, then proceed based on their reaction.”