Page 60 of Cash

EIGHTEEN - Cash

I didn’t wantto do anything that would cause her to compare me to her ex-husband, nor did I want to be the man of my past. I hoped whatever happened between Kimberly and I would be different.

I reached for the buckle of my belt and looked around the room. My mind’s slate was wiped clean of the sexual experiences of my past. With a stomach full of butterflies and a mind filled with hope, I unbuckled my belt.

I was one mistake away from doing what I’d done for a lifetime. Sabotaging what little I’d developed between us would be easy. Preserving it would require a mindset that was unfamiliar to me.

But I was willing to give it an honest try.

Hoping to appear anything but overanxious, I watched with eager eyes as she lifted her dress over her head.

I pushed my jeans down my thighs and then kicked them aside.

She unclasped her bra and dropped it at her feet.

I took off my shirt.

She reached for her panties.

I slipped my thumbs beneath the waistband of my boxers.

We freed ourselves of our last garment as if synchronized. Standing on either side of the bed, naked, we gazed at each other with admiring eyes.

To learn to ride a motorcycle, a person must risk falling over.

I embraced that thought, swallowed hard, and lowered myself onto the bed. Hoping I didn’t do anything stupid between the beginning and the end of whatever we were going to share, I rolled onto my side and watched as she climbed onto the opposite side.

I stared at her with unfocused eyes and inhaled her sweet scent. At that instant, I was no longer in her bedroom. I was in my childhood room, filled with nervous hope that the girl who was willing to give me a moment of her time liked me as much as I liked her.

I reached for her, hoping this time would be different.

I needed it to be.