Page 61 of Savage Ambition

“Just be careful, okay? I’d hate to have to identify your body when they fish you out of the East River.”

I barked a laugh. “Your concern is touching.”

“I’m serious, Shaw. These people don’t mess around. If Dante is in trouble, helping him could put you in danger.”

“But I can’t abandon him.”

“Even if it means risking your life?”

I didn’t have an answer for that.

Trent sighed. “Look, I get it. You care about him. But you need to be smart about this. If Dante is involved in something dangerous, you could get caught in the crossfire. But whatever happens, I’ve got your back. Unlike Jace, I’m not going to bail on you for being who you are.”

“Even if falling for a Mafia sex worker is the worst idea ever?” I asked.

“Especially then. Although I reserve the right to say ‘I told you so’ if this all goes to shit.”

“That’s fine. At least I’ll deserve it.” I ran my fingers through my hair. “What do I do about Jace?”

“Nothing. Keep doing what you’re doing. Let him believe whatever makes him happy.” Trent shrugged. “It’s not like you owe him the truth.”

“Doesn’t lying to him make me a bad friend?”

He shook his head. “You’re protecting yourself. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“I guess. But I really hate putting you in the middle of this. Jace’s your best friend.”

“And you’re family.” Trent’s voice was firm. “Family comes first. Always.”

“I don’t want you to have to choose between us.”

“I’m not choosing. Jace’s making the choice by being a homophobic dick.” Trent set his beer down. “He’s got a good heart underneath all his bullshit. You know that. When Mom died, he slept here for two weeks because he was afraid I’d need someone in the middle of the night. When his dad was at his worst, I was the one who patched him up. We’ve been through too much together for me to just write him off.”

“I know,” I admitted. “He was there for me after my parents died, too.”

“Exactly. But that doesn’t excuse his shitty views about gay people.” Trent sighed. “I keep hoping if I stay in his life, I can help him see how wrong he is. Walking away won’t change him, but staying to teach him how to be better could.”

“Has anything you’ve said made a difference?”

“He doesn’t use slurs as much as he used to, which is a pretty big victory. If I thought he was completely hopeless, I’d walk away from our friendship. But I’m working on him, Shaw. He’s got all this toxic shit from his dad that he needs to unlearn, and it’s not his fault he was raised that way. At the end of the day, underneath the layers of ignorant bullshit, he’s still the same kid who gave me half his lunch every day in middle school when Dad forgot to go grocery shopping because he was too deep in his grief.”

I understood Trent’s conflict. Jace was the best kind of friend you could ask for, minus the random flare-ups of inappropriate comments. It was the only reason I hadn’t written him off.

Trent leaned back. “It’s not ideal, but if he ever figures out you’re gay, it’ll force him to confront his bullshit. And that might actually be good for him in the long run. Maybe if he knows a ‘real’ gay person, he’ll see there’s nothing to be scared of.”

“Or he’ll never speak to either of us again.”

“Then that’s his loss. I love the guy, but I won’t tolerate him hurting you, Shaw. If it comes down to it, I’m always on your side.”

“I appreciate that.” I smiled weakly. “Though it would be easier if he didn’t hate Dante specifically.”

“Yeah, that complicates things a bit.” Trent chuckled. “Of all the guys in New York, you had to fall for the one Jace’s obsessed with destroying.”

“Go big or go home, I guess.” I shrugged. “But seriously, Jace’s grudge against Dante is way out of proportion. It’s been years since high school.”

“Jace holds grudges like they’re Olympic sports and he’s trying to win the gold medal. But even he knows he’s being irrational about Dante. That’s why he gets so defensive when I call him on it. Dante might be arrogant as hell, but he’s never done anything to deserve Jace’s level of hatred.”

“Except exist. And maybe sleep with his sister.”