Page 95 of Gorgeous Misery

I lose track again.

And then… then her whole face changes. She’s not angry, she’s sad now. She cries. And I know this affects Nick. Maybe she planned it that way? Because he takes steps and steps towards her, and she does not back up this time.

Then they are so close I can’t see her face anymore. I break for the door. Merc makes a grab at my arm, but I pull out of his reach, throw the door open and stand on the front stoop. Just… watching them.

Sasha sidesteps away, and Nick turns and see me watching them.

Everything changes.

Sasha stops crying.

Nick turns away from her, walks down the driveway to me, and as he gets closer, he extends his hand.

I don’t want to meet him halfway, and I don’t. But I do come down the steps. I can’t help myself.

“Hey. Come here. I wanna introduce you to someone.” When he reaches me, he takes my hand. But I’m focused on Sasha now, because she followed him.

Of course she followed him. I know the stories of these two. They were promised. Her dad was forced to make a deal with his dad and that was gonna be it for them. Marriage, Company kids, whatever.

Nick was the one who walked out.

Sasha was always the one who couldn’t let go.

“I know who she is,” I say. “I’ll leave you two alone.”

Nick has a hold of my hand when I try to pull away, but he tugs me towards him until we bump together. “Nothing. Has changed.” His voice is low, but clear. “Understand me?” Then he pulls back a little so he can look me in the eyes and wait for my answer.

I nod.

He turns and smiles. “Sash, this is Wendy. Wendy, Sasha.”

Sasha Cherlin and I stare at each other. We could be twins, maybe. If I were older or she were younger. Same blonde hair, same evil blue eyes.

But she and I are nothing alike. Because she is not me. She is not… us.

She is free. She is normal. She has a house, and a dog, and a family. My family, actually. Because she has Lauren. And Lauren, and Nick, and Chek were all I ever had to begin with. And ever since Nick sent Lauren to live with Sasha, I have been missing something. Missing her, of course. But it was more than that.

And then, when Check died, I was missing another something. Him, of course, but again, it was so much more than that. Because all I had left was Nick.

And now I find that I need more Nick.

More, and more, and more Nick.

But now she’s here.

She’s going to make her claim and demand her parts. Little parts at first. But then more, and more, and more parts until there’s nothing left for me. No leftovers, even. She will get Lauren and Nick and I will have no one.

I’m just about to break away and run. Just get in my truck and drive. For days, and days, and days. Maybe I’ll never stop. I’ll drive west until I run out of road, then go south until I come to the end of the world. I’ll disappear. I’ll leave them alone. They don’t need me. I’m just baggage. I’m just—

The screen door slaps behind me and Nick and I turn to find Merc on the stoop behind us. “Sash.” This single word just a little bit hesitant. “So glad you could come.”

“Is this what you wanted my opinion on?” Sasha is annoyed when she motions to Nick.

“Yes. But there’s more to it than that.” Merc and Nick lock eyes for a moment. “A lot more, actually.”

This is when I notice that Harrison has exited the plane and is walking down the driveway towards us, looking like he’d rather be anywhere but here.

“Fine.” Sasha shrugs. “I’m here. So fuck it. Tell me everything.”