Page 50 of Bossy Bride: Emma and Jesse

Meanwhile, I’m set back down on my feet in front of the plank.

They’re not serious, right? I laugh at them.

But then one of them starts dragging me out over the water. This is when I notice the crowd again. Because they go wild and start chanting things like, “Throw her over!” and “Jump! Jump! Jump!”

I look down at the water beneath me, struggling to stay as close to the ship’s deck as I possibly can.

It kinda feels real. Like this bushy-beard head pirate guy really might throw me over.

“No,” I say, shaking my head at him. “Nope. I’m not jumping! I’m getting married!”

He just grins at me. And… is that a gold tooth?

Suddenly a parrot attacks him, landing on his head and flapping wildly. I squeal. The crowd cheers, on my side again.

Then Jesse is here, pulling me back onto the ship’s deck and wrapping his arms around me. “Emma,” he says, pulling me into a tight hug.

I look up at him and smile. “Best wedding ever!”

Then a whole bunch of flames start shooting up behind the ship and the battle is on! We just stand and watch the rest of the show, every now and then scrambling out of the way of the performers as they sing and dance.

But then… then we’re being pulled up a flight of stairs and everyone is waving goodbye.

“Wait!” I yell to Jesse. “We didn’t get married yet!”

“Hey!” Jesse yells. But we’re tugged and pulled backstage and then everyone is high-fiving and shouting excitedly.

“Hey,” Jesse yells again. “What about the wedding?”

“Oh,” one of the head pirates says. “That happens in the chapel.”

“But…” I look back at the stage door that leads outside. “The ship!”

“Sorry,” one of the sirens says. “No weddings on the ship.”

“Then what was this whole show?” Jesse asks. “And the couple who were here before?”

“Oh, that was Jake and Cynthia,” the pirate says. “They work here.”

“What?” Jesse and I both exclaim.

“Yeah,” the siren says. “This is the Save the Beauty Show. They’re the stars.” She shakes her head. “I don’t know how much you paid to take their places, but that was the most fun I’ve had doing this show in years. Congrats!”

And then everyone is walking off.

I look at Jesse and pout. “We’re not even married!”

He looks down at his watch. “Shit. And it’s eleven twenty! We’re late.” He pats his pants, looking for his phone. “Shit.”

“Do not tell me you dropped your phone during the sword fight!”

“I did. It’s not here. I don’t even have my wallet. I knew these pants were too baggy. Where’s yours?”

“In my purse”—I whirl around, looking for the way back to the dressing room I was in—“back in the dressing room.”

“Let’s go find it. Maybe the crew is still waiting for us. We can call them and let them know we’re on our way.”

“But we’re not even married!”