Page 71 of Joey

“So how do I fix that?” he finally asks.

“You be loyal back.”

“I’m not gonna fuck you over. I can’t fuck you over, Brooke. I don’t know anything about you. You have secrets of mine. I have nothing from you. So why are you worried about this?”

“Maybe that’s it?” I say.

“What’s it?”

“You don’t have anything of mine to hold close.”

We lock eyes and I feel sad all of a sudden.

“So tell me something,” he whispers. “Tell me a secret and I’ll hold it close. I swear to God. I won’t ever tell a soul. I am the best secret-keeper ever. Trust me on that. I have seen things…”

He trails off.

I try to picture what Joey Boston has seen. Wonder if it’s anything like I’ve seen. Then decide no. No one’s been through what I’ve been through. No one could ever really understand.

“Here’s the thing, Brooke.”

I’m playing with the hem of my shirt but when he says my name I glance up at him. Find him being very serious.

He swallows hard and says, “My life… my life is… hard to explain. But take my word on this. No one has lived a life quite like mine. And before you tell me that everyone’s life is unique, just hear me out, OK? I get that. I do. We’ve all got a story and unless we tell it, no one really knows us. But I can’t tell mine. To anyone. And the people around me. The people I love and care about, like Huck and Wald. And you,” he adds. “Because I know we just met, but I can see that you are a very nice girl who just happens to be a liar. I see past it.”

And this is what hurts me, I think. But I can’t say that. It hurts me because I’m getting the same feeling. I just know that of all the billions of people on this Earth the only ones who might really get me are these three men I’m with right now.

Call it an emotional reaction. Call it irrational. Call it whatever you want. I don’t care. I feel it.

“I see past it,” he continues, “because I think we are more alike than we realize. And you know, I’m not making a promise right now, or anything like that. But if you stick around, I will be a good friend to you. I am very black and white. Very this and that. I am your friend, or I am not your friend. And when I am your friend, I will do anything for you. So…” He turns towards me a little and takes my hand in both of his. “Can you just… trust me? Tell me a secret if that’s what you need. And I promise to treasure that secret and guard it with my life.”

I press my lips together and take a deep breath. “I want to. I really, really want to,” I whisper back.

“So do it.”

“I haven’t told anyone. Ever.”

“That’s the perfect kind to prove loyalty. I’m good at keeping secrets. I promise you. I have things locked inside of me that have been hiding out in the darkest corners of my mind since I was eleven years old.”

Immediately that picture of him and his brothers comes to mind. That was his approximate age when that pic was taken. Him, holding the baby in his arms. Is the baby one of those secrets?

I look up at him.

“Just one,” he says, encouraging me.

“OK,” I say. Because I’ve been dying to tell someone this since I was sixteen years old. I’ve been holding it inside me like an illness. Like a sickness. And even though I came close a couple times and almost spilled it with a few different people, it never quite got past my lips.

“I was kidnapped as a teenager.”

Until now.

“What?” His eyebrows shoot up.

I nod. “Yeah. I was kidnapped. That’s… not my biggest secret. But it was definitely my first.”

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN - JOEY

That’s not her biggest secret?