Page 36 of Jesse

It’s hard to listen to this. I mean, the whole thing is hard. The realization that I’m partly responsible for drugging and abducting a man and then holding him captive in the basement of our lake house. The whole boat ride over here from his place.

I thought he was dead like sixteen different times. And I couldn’t take my eyes off him. I was so worried and I wanted to go back thirty minutes and change things. Never let him pull into the driveway. Never tell him to send the butler home. Never respond to Mila’s texts.

Because this night—this stupid ice-cream cone date—this was the Jesse I wanted all those years ago.

And he’s different now. I tried telling that to the other girls, but they had settled into this plot and were in it to win it.

But as soon as he woke up he asked about me. Then threatened them.

If you hurt her, I’ll fucking kill you.

Like we were a thing. Like I was his. Like he… cared.

I’m so fucking stupid.

Because he didn’t care.

All their stories of him are just like mine.

The way he pursued them. The way he convinced them that they were special. The way he promised them things.

He said those things to me too. So all these new feelings tonight are just bullshit. Just lies. Just… stupid.

He never cared about me back then and he doesn’t care about me now.

Really doesn’t care about me now. Because he has to know I did this to him.

The door I’m leaning against suddenly opens and I back off as the girls rush through and close it behind them. Mila points to the stairs and we follow her up into the large kitchen.

They rip off their ski masks as we enter, their faces all flushed and hot.

“So he shut up pretty quick, don’t you think?” Natalie says, then gets a coffee cup out of the cupboard and places it under the coffee maker, presses the button and the machine stars whirring to life.

She just makes a cup of coffee like this is no big deal.

“Now what?” Hannah says. She leans against the counter and pulls out her phone, stares at the screen, then smiles and starts texting.

“We should leave him here,” Mila says.

“What?” I say. “For how long?”

“Well, I have to run Stephanie to ballet in the morning. And Donny has a baseball game. So I could probably get back here around one-ish? But we have to be quick because tomorrow night is the new-recruit dinner and I’m in charge this time.” She looks at me like this all makes perfect sense.

Let’s just leave the abducted billionaire in the basement overnight and then after I finish mom-ing tomorrow, we’ll pick this back up and finish it.

Hannah bursts out laughing.

We all look at her.

“Sorry! But Devin just sent me a chemistry joke.”

Natalie takes a sip of her coffee, then says, “OK. Well, I’ve got two dates tonight so I’m good with leaving him overnight.”

“What?” I say. “Like what is happening right now? And how do you have two dates tonight? It’s nearly two AM!”

She shrugs. “Well, the first one is just a quick look-see. The second one is sex and breakfast. And they both live within two blocks of me. God, I love it when it works out like that.”

“You guys!” I say. “We just abducted a man and he’s tied up in our basement!”