Page 16 of Play Dirty

“The fuck?”

I shrug. “He looked like he was having fun in there. So what’s the problem?”

“The problem is… the problem is…” Her eyes dart back and forth, like she’s not sure what to say. “The problem is… if he refuses to come I’ll never get pregnant.”

“Whoa,” I say. “If you think I’m giving the two of you a fucking kid, you can just fuck off right now. I’m not doing it.”

“That’s not what I said. And anyway, that’s not the plan.”

“The plan?” I say. Because that itch is back. The one telling me to look a little closer at the fine print. “What is the fucking plan? Alexander and I fuck around and what? He suddenly realizes he loves you and wants to stay?”

“He wants you. He’s the one who wants the past back, not me. I’m doing this for him.”

“Well, that’s funny. He said the same thing about you. So looks like none of us know what the fuck is going on. Maybe you should go back inside and figure that out, Augustine. Because I’m not some magic oracle with all the answers. I’m a fucking Pandora’s Box. So you’d better be very fucking careful if you decide to open me up.”

She just stares at me. Eyebrows narrowed. Questioning. Lots of questions running through her mind about what I just said.

And then—because I know her, because I know she won’t get up and leave—I get up and leave instead. I walk downstream, following the river.

And I don’t even look back.

The first time I met Augustine she and Ixion were sharing an apartment down the street from UCLA. It was a total shithole, but it was home. I used to come down from Stanford for spring break while I was in undergrad. At first to just kick it with Ix. But then, for both of them.

The first time we ever fucked Alexander wasn’t there. It was just the three of us. I think she might’ve known Alexander at that time, but they weren’t a thing yet.

She and I… well, it was lust at first sight. I was fucking her in the bathroom two hours later. We were all pretty drunk and Ixion had some people over, so he didn’t notice we were missing right away. I don’t know why I was fucking her in the bathroom. But it was fucking hot. I had her propped up on the sink, one leg raised in the air, my cock plunging inside her, disappearing, then pulling back out, slick and shiny with her desire. She was digging her nails into my shoulders the same way she was digging into Alexander’s inside.

We both heard Ixion calling for us. People had left, he was suddenly aware we were gone. And the door wasn’t locked so he walked right in. Innocent mistake? Probably not. But no one cared. He just walked up to us, put his hands on her face, and kissed her mouth.

And then I joined in.

So maybe we were drunk. But we did it again a few more times before Ix figured out this was bad news for the working relationship they were forging. He backed away, slowly, quietly and without drama.

And then it was just me and her. Ix would watch. That was always his thing. Even after Alexander joined us, he’d watch.

But after we graduated and I moved down to LA for law school… that’s when shit got serious. That’s when I moved in with them.

That’s what she’s trying to recreate with this little reunion.

When I go back to the cabin it’s dark. But they’ve got lights on inside and it looks cozy and shit, ya know? Like… if I didn’t know better I’d think it was pretty fucking normal. Maybe even perfect.

But when I open the door and walk inside Augustine is on the couch—the same place where Alexander fucked her earlier—reading a book. And Alexander is sitting at the kitchen table, talking business on his cell phone. He looks at me, nods his head, and never breaks his conversation.

Augustine just turns a page in her book. She’s got her glasses on looking like a sexy nerd. Which used to make me want to fuck her when she wore that look back in LA.

I flop into the chair opposite. The same one I was sitting in, watching her get fucked.

Or fingered, as it was. Because Alexander never did fuck her, did he?

“What are you reading?” I ask.

“Required stuff,” she says, taking her glasses off so she can see me properly.

“Required for what?”

“I’m in grad school. Just online stuff. Getting an MFA.”

I laugh, I can’t help it.