Page 58 of Balance

“Still can’t handle a bit of praise and acknowledgement of a job well done, can you, sweetheart?”

I huffed out a laugh as Matthew combed his fingers through my hair. He’d already learned how best to calm me down. How to easily wind me up. How to soothe me when I was overstimulated and how to settle me. Matthew was my rock, and I leaned against him, letting him shelter me.

“I’m working on it.” Realizing that this was the first time we’d been alone all day, I wriggled around on his lap until I was straddling him. Looping my arms around his neck, I stole a kiss. A hint of whiskey lingered on his breath, and I wrinkled my nose.

“Jett insisted on a pre-party celebratory drink.” Matthew cradled my face and kissed me again, slower and deeper. The spicy, smoky notes mingled together and if it had been up to me, Matthew would be stripping me naked and fucking me on his desk.

But it wasn’t up to me. It was up to Daddy. And Daddy still had an important party to attend. He had more hands to shake and more people to pay attention to who weren’t me.

“Problem, darling?” Matthew asked. He narrowed his gaze at me like he already knew what was wrong but wanted to see if I’d tell him. Sometimes I would and sometimes I wouldn’t. Today, I decided to be honest. I didn’t want to cause problems on his important day.

“I hate that we have to go back out there.” I admitted, doing my best not to pout, but I couldn’t help it. Being with Matthew had grounded me in many ways. I was calmer overall. I got into fewer loops of self-destruction because he was there by my side, every step of the way. A partner in every sense of the word. He stood beside me when I needed him, and behind me, and sometimes he stepped in front of me.

Matthew also gave me the freedom to express myself in ways that I guess I always had done, but without the safety net of a person who cared about me. He made it safe for me to pout, to be moody. He gave me room to act out sometimes, whether it was part of a role play or me expelling excess emotions.

“Who says we have to go back?” Matthew’s thumb brushed against my cheek and I leaned into his touch.

“It’s your big launch day. Everyone is here.”

“And we launched. And we transferred the first donation this morning. And the announcement has been made. In fact, I think,” he paused and looked at his watch. “Right about now, Jett is herding everyone down to the bar on the first floor. We are not expected to make an appearance. Unless you want to.”

“Can I say no?”

“Sweetheart, you can always say no. I was hoping you would actually. Daddy wants to take you home and celebrate with you.”

“On one condition.”

“What’s that?” Matthew asked, though the way he smiled made me think he probably knew before I asked.

“Spank me?” I batted my eyelashes at him.

He smiled like he’d expected me to ask that exact thing. Matthew could read me like a book. There was never hiding anything from him. Which was just as well, because I didn’t want to. All of me was for him. Always.