Page 57 of Smoke and Glitter

"What?"

"Something real."

His brow pulls together.

"About you."

"I tell you things."

"No, you don't. I know basic facts."

"Autumn."

"I know what you drink. I know where you grew up. I know you hate cilantro and you don't sleep well after inventory nights. I know you wanted Pilsen before you ever admitted you were actually trying to buy it."

His expression closes a little at that.

I keep going anyway.

"But the things that matter?"

My voice drops.

"I learn those from other people, or from things I observe."

He knows where this is going before I say it.

"Summer told me about Elise."

His jaw locks.

"Don't."

"Why?"

"Because that's not..."

"What?"

He looks away.

I feel my heart beating against my ribs.

"Say her name."

He looks back at me.

"You were married to her."

"You think I need reminding?"

"And you've never said her name to me."

"Because it doesn't matter anymore."

It isn't the sentence I overheard, but it's close enough to make my stomach turn.

"Maybe it doesn't matter to you."