Page 57 of Never the Same

“But there’s no guarantee the same drug used on them or Trevor’s cousin was the one used on me. Doubtfully by the same person.” My thoughts drifted back to that mystery book and formula. There had to be a connection—how could there not be? “There’s just no way it’s a coincidence I was searching for a cure to memory loss, and then this happened to me.”

“Wait, what?” Audrey stepped closer. “You were looking for the book for a cure?”

I clocked a surprised look from Alex, but Ryder turned to the side and palmed his jaw like this wasn’t news to him. Why hadn’t Reed told them both the whole story?

I kept quiet, unable to answer Audrey, too busy reading everyone’s body language.

Audrey shot Reed a wide-eyed, questioning look, and he subtly lifted his hand and patted the air while lightly shaking his head, as if telling her to back down.

What was that all about? “Yes.” I finally broached the awkward quiet while standing tall. “Julian said I was planning to reverse the formula once I found it. Save memories, not steal them.”

Audrey walked backward, right into her husband, and he caught hold of her arms.

“Anyone want to tell me what’s going on?” I cut to it, trying to fend off the return of anxiousness. I was currently comfortably sitting between panic and calm, and wasn’t in the mood to let the pendulum swing all the way over to the shaky side.

“Now’s not the time,” Reed said in a low voice, eyeing Alex, not me, who was staring at him as well. “Please,” he tacked on, now studying me with a somber request in his gaze.

There was so much hurt and pain in his eyes that all I could do was nod and agree.

“Do we, um . . . know anything about my grandfather? My mother said he passed, but he’s the one who raised Tristan until he was eighteen. Maybe he’s the key to figuring out more about this mystery brother and that book.”

Reed visibly relaxed at the reprieve I’d given him by changing subjects.

“If he really raised Tristan, there’s no legal record of it. No evidence of anything relating to your brother, in fact. Gwen did the digging, too, so if she couldn’t find anything, it’s more than buried—it’s nonexistent.” Ryder removed his hat, squeezed both sides of the brim, then put it back face forward. “And we confirmed your grandfather did die back in 2012.”

I mindlessly petted Ranger. “From what?”

“Heart attack. Home alone at the time,” he answered.

I waited to feel grief. To feel something.

“You okay?” Audrey asked as I stood, resting her hand on my forearm. “Shoot, sorry, of course you’re not. Maybe rest?”

To stay put or run? I was torn, but went with a “Probably a good idea,” in response.

“If you’re up for it, maybe tomorrow we can watch a movie or something?” she suggested.

“Sure.” I peeked around Audrey to locate Reed. He was in the kitchen now, hands on the breakfast bar, muscles tight and spine stiff.

Now wasn’t the time to ask him if he was okay—not in front of his friends—but he was clearly far from it.

“Come on, Ranger.” I patted my leg. “Thank you for your help.” I took off, only to stop walking once in the hallway. I set my back to the wall and shut my eyes, my heart slamming hard against my rib cage. Get a grip. Be strong. I issued a few more commands to myself, but none helped loosen the sadness now festering inside me like a disease. I couldn’t pretend my way out of what I was feeling.

“Did you tell her about my dad?”

I immediately opened my eyes at Reed’s words, snapping me from sad to alert within a second.

“Alex told you, so . . . did you tell Hollis?” Reed asked someone.

“Of course not,” Audrey responded, her voice low but audible enough for me to still hear. “Do you think she was trying to find a cure for your dad?”

“Just forget I said anything, please,” Reed rushed out. “I’m going outside, and for the love of all that’s holy, no one follow me.”

Now I knew why Reed was so on edge. You think I was trying to help your father. I wandered to my bedroom, gently closed the door, and dropped down on my bed. The question is . . . was I?

Chapter Twenty

Reed