Page 31 of Asystole

“What?” I ask, not understanding the look.

“You ramble when you’re tired.”

“Do I?” I ask, even though I know he’s right.

“Mmhmm,” Logan hums, turning up the heat and pulling out of the parallel parking spot he’d managed to find on the street.

My head falls back against the headrest.

“Why can’t you sleep?” I ask abruptly. My filter is gone, and something about Logan makes me comfortable enough to ask personal questions. Maybe it’s because he’s the only one in Boston who knows Hanlon, or maybe it’s because I know he misses Stone, and because Hanlon is with Stone, it somehow binds our loneliness. Who knows? I’m probably reaching for a connection because I’m fucking exhausted, but still, I want to know.

“What are you talking about?” Logan asks in a tone that says he knows exactly what I’m talking about, but isn’t ready to discuss it.

“Really? We’re going to play coy?” I ask, rolling my head to the side to give him a pointed look.

He huffs a sigh because he knows I’m calling him out, and thankfully, he drops the act and opts for the truth.

Exhaling as though he’s resigned himself to a terrible fate, he says, “Tonight is the annual employee Christmas party at Ricochet Ridge. I’m sure Hanlon and Stone are telling everyone their good news and…” he trails off, and I try to finish the thought for him.

“You’re glad you don’t have to witness it?”

He’s silent for a couple of minutes before finally whispering, “I wish it was me.”

I didn’t know my heart could totally break for a dude I’m still getting to know, but here it is, shattering in his front seat. Without thinking, I place my hand on the back of his neck and squeeze it gently.

“I’m really sorry, Logan. I didn’t realize you and Stone were so close.”

Logan shakes his head as we merge onto the highway.

“That’s just it. We never were…not like that, at least. Where am I heading?”

“Take the exit before the hospital. I live in the condo complex up on the hill. What do you mean you were never that close?”

“Stone and I. We never dated. We never even hooked up. Hell, I only ever kissed him once, and it was a total clusterfuck. I mostly did it to piss Hanlon off,” Logan admits, making me sit totally upright and whip my head toward him with wide eyes.

“You’ve been hardcore pining over this guy for years and you never even fucked?!” I yell.

Thankfully, instead of being pissed, Logan just laughs.

“You ever heard of unrequited love, asshole?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t realize it could accompany unrequited dick.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he says with a smile.

“Maybe, but I’m not the one losing sleep over an asshole I’ve never even been inside of,” I point out.

Logan gives me a quick glance before looking back at the road.

“To be fair, I doubt you’ve ever been inside any asshole, so no, you probably wouldn’t lose sleep over the one you missed out on.”

This conversation has woken me up a little, and I grow serious under the cover of the darkness that surrounds us.

“Seriously, though. What is it about Stone that you’re hung up on? I genuinely don’t mean to be a prick, but he chose someone else. Why hang on to him?”

“Have you ever been in love?” Logan asks abruptly.

“Sure, I mean Kendra and I have been together for a long-ass time,” I remind him.