Page 14 of The Highland Heir

“I know what I am,” she said, only theslightest change of color in her cheeks to prove she understoodthis was improper. “But I’m not sure what you are.”

“And you don’t need to.”

“Please, Kier. We’ve never had secretsbetween us before.”

“Aye, we have, we just didn’t speak of them.Just as we won’t speak about this.”

He didn’t want to speak of this with Ellie.And not just because it wasn’t honorable to speak to a woman aboutsuch things. Actually, it wasn’t because of that really at all. Hewas only grasping on to that as an excuse.

He and Ellie had not held themselves to suchproprieties before. They’d talked about all sorts of topics thatwouldn’t have been proper because of her being a woman and he beinga man.

But this . . . nay. He didn’t wantto speak of it with her.

“You haven’t,” she said, sounding sure ofherself. He kept his expression steady. He didn’t want her to knowshe was right.

He’d never been embarrassed to talk aboutmany things to Ellie, but this was different.

At his age, he should have a vast knowledgeand a wealth of experience, like the other men, but he didn’t.

And not for lack of opportunities. When he’dbeen young, or rather younger than he was now, he’d had women offerthemselves to him often, but after years of passing them over theyeventually stopped asking.

He’d been grateful at the time, but now herather wished he’d have just done it so it would be over with. Anywoman would expect him to know his way at this point.

He knew enough from Teague to know it wasleft to a man’s father to see this deed done when a boy turned intoa man. And Kieran had waited, but his father never talked to him onthe topic.

When he’d asked Teague, the chief had toldhim not to get a babe on a woman who wasn’t his wife. He said thelaird wouldn’t take kindly to find Kieran sired a bastard, letalone a number of them.

Kieran allowed Teague to think he’d takencare of the matter of his virginity when, in fact, he had not. Henever felt comfortable with any woman. Not enough to do such athing with her. He thought he should care for her at least as muchas he cared for Ellie before joining with her, and he never had.Perhaps using his friendship with Ellie as a gauge had been amistake. But it was too late to change that.

And now his shame would be shared withEllie.

“It’s not your business,” he said with asneer, hoping she’d let it drop. Of course, she didn’t.

“It may not be my business, but I know you’venot lain with anyone. If you had, you would have said so. Youwouldn’t have allowed me to keep deviling you about it. You wouldhave put an end to it.”

“Mayhap I knew if I told you, it wouldn’tkeep you from deviling me over who it had been.”

She tilted her head from side to side as ifinspecting him like a bird did to a tasty worm. To falter or somuch as glance away would be failure, so he kept his gaze onhers.

Eventually, she relented.

“I can’t tell if that’s true or not. Butyou’re right. I do want to know who it was. It better not have beenAggie. She always acted as if she knew something I didn’t. Pleasetell me it wasn’t her.”

“Nay. It wasn’t her.” Though she’d been oneof the lasses to offer herself to him before she’d married.

“Then who?” Ellie pressed.

“A man doesn’t talk about such things. It’sdisrespectful.”

“Nay. It’s disrespectful for a man to tellother men such a thing, for they might expect the same service forthemselves. That’s not the case with us, so you can tell me andknow I’ll never share it with another soul.” She held up herscarred hand in promise.

“What if it is something I wish to keep formyself?” He placed his scarred hand over his heart. With a sigh,she relented.

“Very well, I guess that is fair. But willyou tell me if she was a virgin?”

“All women were virgins at some point,” hedeflected.

“You know what I mean. Was she a virgin whenshe lay with you?”