Page 96 of Under the Influence

The second Ms. Mason's door slams in my face, I know it doesn’t matter that I want her. It doesn’t matter if I can’t learn how to show her. I contemplate waiting and forcing her to speak to me, but that hasn't exactly worked in my favor yet.

So I leave.

I don’t care that my dad will be pissed at me for ditching school, either.

"Where are you going?" Carson asks, jogging toward me.

"Home," I quickly retort.

"Where's Cori? What happened."

I throw my hands up dramatically, "Nothing."

"You are a shit liar," he laughs. "And this back and forth between you two is exhausting."

I slam the palm of my hand into the red lockers lining the hallway, "Well, lucky for you, there is no 'you two,' so I'm sure she'll be thrilled to talk to you. Why don't you go find her?"

I leave him standing there, arms crossed in the hallway, staring me down. It’s one of the only times I've yelled at him like that, and I feel the guilt lurking in before I even get to the door. I’ve yelled at him a lot lately. I turn around to apologize, but he's gone.

I push through the doors, not bothering to sign out. Ill have someone in the office take care of that later. A sophomore office worker will do just about whatever I want. So I'll have her make sure she marks me present in all classes.

I’m not actually planning to go home because that is the last place I've wanted to be here lately but knowing that Drayton is at school and Dad is probably at work meant that I'd have the place to myself.

And that was normal.

I figure that I won’t notice my mother's absence much but not having her to look after means that I focus on myself. More time to think, and it doesn't ever end well when I start thinking.

It's too dangerous.

God, I just want to see her, even if she is coming home high, only to pass out twenty minutes later. At least she didn't pretend everything was okay like my dad. She knew she had made a mistake, and she was living with it. That had to count for something. Accountability that is.

My dad didn't even care to come around until he met Daria. Almost like he is putting on a show for her, of what a great dad he is. When in reality, he was never here, and I don't even blame my mom for cheating. She needed attention from somewhere, but I wish it wouldn't have been from Ethan Blackwood.

I walk into the house, instantly overwhelmed with the smell of fresh cookies and laughter from the kitchen, causing my stomach to turn.

Shit.

I turn to leave, but my dad's voice stops me, "Nash? What are you doing home?"

I turn to him, gripping my keys tight, "What are you doing here? Don't you have some tits to enlarge or something?"

His eyes pierce into me, "I'm the adult. Let me ask the questions. Why aren't you in school?"

"Because I feel like shit."

I notice Daria round the corner, her hair in two braids, looking as innocent as ever. "Oh, that's no good, sweetie. Want me to make you some soup?"

I can't help but scowl. I can take care of myself, "No, I don't need your help."

"Nash," my dad warns. "You look fine."

"Well, I don't feel fine."

"Is it your wrist?" she asks, motioning to the black cast wrapped around it.

I ignore her, trying to walk past my father when his hand lands on my shoulder, "Wait right there. Since you're here, we can talk."

Great, that's exactly what I want.