Page 134 of The Long Road Back to Yesterday

Richard remained at Pemberley, and the four of them settled into the strange business of waiting for a day that might erase their shared history.

Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam rarely spoke of Arbor Low. Neither wished to dwell upon the possibility of losing the life they had together. For now, they had one another, and they were determined not to surrender the time that remained to fears of what might come afterward.

Elizabeth was surprised by how ordinary happiness could be. She and Fitzwilliam spent as much time together as possible. During the day, they both had duties requiring their attention, but at night, they remained together in Elizabeth’s room. They talked in the darkness, loved each other, and slept in one another’s arms, increasingly reluctant to surrender even an hour of the time they had left.

Elizabeth had once imagined that the great happiness of being loved must reside in declarations and moments of great consequence.

Instead, she discovered it in a hundred small things she had never known to wish for.

It made December twenty-first difficult to contemplate.

* * *

Five days before the solstice, Elizabeth entered the music room and found Georgiana seated at the pianoforte with an open sheet of music before her. She was not playing. One hand rested low upon her abdomen, and her attention was fixed there.

Elizabeth crossed the room at once. “Are you unwell, Georgie?”

“No. I felt something a moment ago, and I think it was my baby.”

Elizabeth sat beside her.

They waited together until Georgiana suddenly drew a breath and pressed her hand more firmly against her gown.

“There. It moved again.”

Wonder softened her face.

“I knew there was a child,” Georgiana said. “I understood what Dr. Wynn told me and what being with child meant, but knowing is very different from feeling it.”

She remained quiet for a moment, her hand still beneath the gentle curve of her abdomen.

“I still want to go back, Lizzy. I do not want to take a holiday at Ramsgate or meet Wickham, and I want to be an innocent fifteen-year-old again and believe Fitzwilliam can protect me from everything. Feeling the child has not changed any of that.”

Elizabeth took her hand.

“For months I have wished Wickham had never harmed me, but only now do I realize that wishing him away comes with other consequences.”

Tears filled her eyes.

Elizabeth remained beside her, not knowing what to say.

Some time later, Fitzwilliam entered the music room. He looked from Elizabeth to his sister and came directly toward them.

“I felt the quickening.”

Fitzwilliam sat on her other side and took her hand.

“I have been telling Lizzy that I still want to go back. I want to stop Wickham before any of this happens.”

Fitzwilliam took her hand and pressed it.

“You may still change your mind, Georgiana. If you decide not to cross with us, I will remain behind with you.”

Her face crumpled, and Fitzwilliam drew her against him.

Elizabeth moved nearer and rested her hand upon Georgiana’s shoulder while Fitzwilliam held his sister close.

Chapter 43: The Crossing