Page 48 of The Mafia Bachelor

She tilts up her chin in a dismissive gesture and suddenly the bulky man is at my side. I recognise him. I go to dodge away, my thoughts full of getting to Kill, however that’s possible…?

But Shane is there, blocking me, more nimble than a man of his size should be. “Mrs Farrell has told you,” he rumbles. “Don’t make a scene.”

The thought of him putting a hand on me is unbearable. Like it would pollute the feeling still on my skin from Kill’s touch last night.

I sag.

“This way.”

I obey, traipsing out of the house like a teenager on my way to school.

And all I can think of with every step is Kill. How I’m going to miss him. How I’m leaving half of my soul behind. How I’ll never recover from this, because I won’t see him again.

I can’t bear the thought of seeing him with his wife, so I can’t go back and pretend to have a job. I’ve messed this up totally.

The job has been the least of it.

Spending time with Kill, being on his side, him being on mine. His whispered words of affection and being the centre of his attention.

I try not to cry.

But as I get into the back of an SUV I drag my hands through my hair, and tears prickle behind my eyes. I don’t have my phone, or my luggage, but what does it matter? I guess they’ll return it to me eventually.

The pressure builds in my head.

He’ll probably be fine with it. Kill agreed to do this competition to please his mam, and whatever else you might be able to say about his morals, which are very grey at best, he loves his family.

He’d be a great dad.

Tears leak out, and I smear them off my face with my sleeve. The sweater that Kill gave me, and that thought makes more take their place.

I mustn’t cry. He was never for me. I’m too young for him. I’m not part of his world, and I don’t belong. However good our night together was, it doesn’t change the fact that I wandered off the street and stumbled somewhere I had no business being. His mother always knew that.

I can’t stop the tears now. I’m crying in earnest, not just with my eyes but my chest contracting. I try to turn away from the driver, not wanting him to see, but I can’t. So I drop my chin and as silently as I can, cry my stupid heart out.

Maybe he wouldn’t care anyhow.

So that’s how it ends. Not with me clapping and smiling politely as he picks someone more suitable than me. Not with me watching as he refuses to marry altogether.

No, it’s just a sad little journey, on my own, back to London. And away from the only man I’ve ever wanted. The only man I’ve ever loved.

21

KILLIAN

The conversation with Brandon takes longer than I’d like, and by the time it’s done, I’ve found the ring box I stashed at the bottom of my suitcase. Ready. Then I’m impatient for Avery to be back. Not having her near is unbearable now. Business calls would be much better if she were by my side.

And overnight, I made a decision. No more. Avery is mine, and there’s no one else for me. I can’t bear another minute without her. As soon as I’ve hung up, I’m walking out, heading for the rooms allocated to Avery and the others.

I bang on her door, and a trickle of unease goes through me when she doesn’t answer. Then I open it, and… No suitcase. It’s quiet. The bed is untouched since she spent the night with me.

My brow furrows and dread drips down my back. This doesn’t make sense, unless she brought everything to my rooms, and somehow we missed each other?

It doesn’t seem likely, and my heart rises up my throat as I stride back to my suite on the other side of the house.

I fling open the door, and my spine freezes. No sign that she’s been here except the rumpled sheets on the bed we shared.

Suspicion and fury dance at the edge of my vision. Fear like I’ve never felt, because where is she?