Page 6 of Restless Obsession

TWO

LUCY RAE

There were a lot of rules when it came to being a cam girl.

From not giving out your real name to any kind of hint of where you actually lived, because there were too many weirdos out in the real world to even try and tempt fate.

I’d heard too many cautionary tales from one cam girl to another that I’d never toed that line. Honestly, I’d never been tempted to, if I was being honest.

Being as vague as possible with my subscribers had come easily.

It was important not to blur the lines in this industry.

It had been easy. Until two months ago, when a new subscriber came in and shook my life up like he was holding it in a snow globe, and now all I could do was watch the sparkling bits land where they might around me.

Keeping the man I knew as DaddyV an arm’s length away wasn’t easy.

Real life had somehow bubbled into work life and vice versa.

Camming was fun to me. Exciting, even.

But the harsh reality was that it was also nerve wrecking at times. Your subscribers might pay to see you, but sometimes you got crazy judgmental assholes who loved to humiliate and degrade you when you didn’t give their messages enough attention. Those were easy to fix, though. You simply blocked them, and that was it. Problem fixed. The other issue with camming was how incredibly lonely it could be.

So many people, men mostly, looked down at you when you were honest about what you did for work. Which was ironic considering they were the same men who subscribed and sent tips for every little morsel you offered them.

I’d tried dating after becoming a cam girl. But after the second time I’d gone on a first date and a guy had looked his nose down at me for being who I was and not having any shame about it, I’d decided I was done with dating.

I hadn’t been on one in over two years.

I worked, hung out with friends, enjoyed my hobbies, and that was it.

It was good enough for me.

But maybe because of that and the fact my best friend was now happily married, and I felt like a nuisance bugging her to hang out when she had a new husband at home, I had been really lonely. And a lonely Lucy was never good.

A lonely Lucy always found herself in some kind of trouble or shenanigan.

And boy, that was definitely the case now.

The biggest rule of all, the most important one when being a cam girl, was not to get emotionally tangled up with a client. Or were they customers? Whatever I wanted to call them, catching feelings for a subscriber, to me personally, had always been a huge no-no since I’d started camming the morning after I’d turned twenty.

Something I genuinely enjoyed doing.

I wasn’t doing it to pay for something honorable like my education, and it wasn’t a means to an end so I could get out of a bad situation.

I liked what I did.

I loved it, actually.

Exploring and chatting with strangers might sound like social anxiety annex to some, but for me, it had felt like almost a calling. And getting paid so they could shower you in compliments while you did what you were already going to do behind closed doors? Why not? I knew what people saw when they first looked at me. Thanks to my height and coloring, curves and probably the way I held myself, everyone assumed I was shy and sweet.

Almost innocent. And if I was honest, I worked that to my advantage.

But I’d messed up.

Colossally.

Not that I had anyone to talk to these days. Monica, my childhood bestie, and I had grown apart since she got married. And that was okay. Monica was great, but if I was honest, she was a little judgmental. Well, a lot judgmental. And I could only imagine what she would have to say about DaddyV and the fact I’d let him worm his way not just under my skin but deep down into the marrow of who I was.