Page 29 of Your Pace Or Mine

“That’s great!” I remember Seth as a skinny, awkward guy who didn’t date much. It’s nice to see that he’s found the right person. Is everyone but me pairing up these days? I look over at Sebastian; he seems a bit off, his expression blank.

“I guess so.”

“You aren’t excited for them?”

He looks at me tentatively, then turns away. “Obviously I’m happy for him since this is what he wants, but you know I don’t like weddings. They’re not my scene, unless I’m trying to meet women.” He pauses and sighs, and I’m surprised at his sudden guilelessness. “I guess it feels like everyone’s moving into this new life and I’m left behind. Not that I want to go there. You know I’m never getting married. It still feels weird though, knowing soon I’ll be the only single one left.”

“I feel you,” I say, even though I don’t fully. I understand being left out; my own best friend is racing toward the aisle now, and it feels like I’m the last kid to be picked in gym class. Which reminds me of middle school because being a short kid obsessed with Broadway musicals didn’t exactly make me popular at age twelve. It’s not the same with Sebastian, though. I don’t know what it’s like when what you want is different from all your friends.

He shakes his head as though shaking off his melancholy thought. “He’s happy and she’ll be happy. That’s what matters. I hope I don’t have to make a speech or something.”

“I’d pay to watch that,” I joke. “Or else I’ll give you my speech from Samantha’s wedding last year and you can swap out the names. Though you might want to change the bit about your shared love for boy bands and choreographed dance routines.”

Thinking about the wedding reminds me that I haven’t heard from my sister in a while. The last time I texted to see how things were, she said they were great, and that was that. I wonder with a sinking feeling whether she just doesn’t want to talk to me.

Sebastian responds to my comment with a smile. If I’m expecting some more deep insights into his contemplation of the single life, I’m disappointed because then he looks up. “I think your friends are here.”

Not everyone has stuck around after the run, but Cal and Laurel are in line for coffee along with Tess and Jason. I suspect they’re both eager to inspect my notorious womanizing friend, though for different reasons. Jason probably wants to swap tips, and Tess was checking him out earlier like she’d be okay with a hot fling.

“How did you like the run?” Cal asks, coming up to our table. “You did pretty well for your first time out.”

Sebastian grimaces, then pulls his face together. “I have a newfound respect for Ashley, that’s for sure. Apparently running is hard.”

“Yes, but you come to love it.”

Sebastian raises an eyebrow, but all he says is “I’m glad to meet Ash’s friends. She certainly talks a lot about you.”

“Well, you’re welcome to come run with us again,” Cal replies, then gives me a glance as though realizing I may not want Sebastian to become a regular in my space.

“Sure, just think—one day schlepping uptown every Saturday morning will be like second nature,” I say lightly.

“Yeah, thanks but no thanks.” Sebastian shakes his head vigorously, then considers his audience. “You guys are nice, but it’s a bit of a hike so early in the morning.”

He invited himself along, but there’s no use in pointing that out now.

Laurel approaches with the rest of the group, and we chatter about life in general. Sebastian joins in at times, then fiddles with his phone. After a while, our coffee cups empty, we all get up to leave.

“So, do you want to come over?” I don’t know why I suggested that. It makes no sense for Sebastian to come back to my place seeing as I don’t have any clothes that would fit him, and he won’t want to hang out in his sweaty ones.

“Thanks, but I’m going to take an Uber home and shower.” I immediately picture his broad frame under the hot steam and know that I shouldn’t. He lifts his phone obnoxiously and smirks. “Looks like I’ve got a potential date tonight, so I need to get some work done before I get dolled up.”

“Oh, yeah, of course. I hope for your social media feed’s sake that you get a good story out of it.”

He gives me a dubious look. “A good story because it’s amazingly hot or because it’s awful?”

“Either one.”

We both laugh, and he heads off, leaving me to walk home alone. Laurel and I used to walk back to our buildings together, but now that Cal’s living with her, I figure those days are over. So I’m surprised to find her waiting for me by the door of the coffee shop.

“Cal left while you and Sebastian were talking,” she explains as we start the walk home. “He figured I’d want to stay and talk to you. Plus there’s only one bathroom, and washing off post-run sweat is not the sexy kind of showering together. He’s gone to claim the bathtub first.”

Huh. Maybe Sebastian is right and living together is too much proximity, unless you can afford two bathrooms.

“You didn’t tell me you’re going to North Bay next week.” I didn’t mean to sound accusatory, but my tone sounds harsh enough that she flinches.

“We kept going back and forth on dates. We had to work around a few family things, plus he wants me to meet some of his old friends. Sorry I didn’t tell you before.”

We’ve come to a traffic light, and she reaches out and squeezes my hand in her mittened one, her eyes soft. I try to push down my feelings of being left out.