Page 69 of A Million To Fall

The shame sits on my chest like a rhino. So does the money in my pocket.

I reach into my jeans and feel them—five crisp hundreds, folded neatly.

Enough to make a difference.

Enough to make me sick.

My brain’s on a damn loop.

It’s fine.

It was just one time.

It’s for Cassie and Bronx.

It’s nothing like what your mom did.

That last thought makes my heart stutter every time. She never told me outright that’s what she was doing, but it doesn’t exactly take a genius. The strange men coming and going. The look in her eyes when they were gone, like they had taken a part of her with them.

Nausea floods me.

This isn’t the same.

I’m not her.

This was an exception. Controlled. A means to an end.

I groan, dragging both hands down my face like I can wipe away what happened. Then I grab my duffel bag.

I’ve already decided I’m not staying here. Sleeping in my car might suck, but at least I don’t have to constantly worry about coming face-to-face with the woman who bought my body last night.

I’ll come up with something to tell Jake. I don’t want to impose. Your mom’s busy. Whatever.

What I’m not going to say is: I let her suck my dick. I let her fuck me in your dad’s bed. I took her money. All while you were asleep in the same house.

I pad down the hallway in my socks, trying not to wake anyone. I’ll just… slip out.

So much for not running away again. Sorry, Jake.

“Boston!” I hear Mrs. Davis’s voice from the kitchen.

Shit.

I turn. She’s already there, barefoot in that damn silk robe, a coffee mug in hand. Her hair is pulled back, face clean. She looks… refreshed. Like she had a fantastic night’s rest.

“Are you going somewhere?” Her voice is all sugar, but her eyes drop to my bag. I can tell she already knows the answer… and doesn’t like it.

“Heading to work,” I say.

She raises her eyebrows at me.

“It’s early.” She beckons me to join her in the kitchen. “Come on, at least take some coffee for the road.”

God, I really don’t want to linger, but I can’t just bolt. That would make this feel even worse than it already does.

She pours me a to-go cup without waiting for my answer. “How do you take it?”

I swallow.