Page 94 of Of Shadows and Blood

“I’m sorry,” I say as I wipe the happy tears welling in my eyes.

He’s just staring at me, searching my face again. For what, I do not know.

“Hey, Cedric!” Baron calls.

Cedric pauses before tearing his eyes from mine. “No,” he groans before tilting his head back and letting a deep chuckle rumble as he rubs his eyes.

“Come on, old sport,” Baron pushes, now crouching in front of us. In his hands is a golden box filled with a shimmering black powder.

“Not tonight,” Cedric says with a raised hand. Baron also makes a pouty face, but I hold back my wine-induced laughter.

“Oh, but you said that last time.”

I turn to Cedric now, shocked that these two might be more mischievous than I expected. Because that black powder is not charcoal.

Baron then looks to me. “Perhaps Liv would like to partake?” Over his shoulder Hera and Från are doing a toast of their own, only now with this black powder they lick from the back of their hands.

Cedric closes the box, answering for me. “The answer’s no, Baron.”

I look to Cedric, taken aback. He can’t just be making decisions for me. As Baron is standing up to walk away, I grab his pant leg. “What is it? The powder?”

He smiles and sits on the other side of me.

“It’s Death Dust.”

That sounds like a superb, welcoming activity.

“Doesn’t that sound fun,” I deadpan.

Baron opens the box back up and leans closer. “That’s where you’re wrong. Pure ecstasy. Your deepest feelings amplified by one hundred. Imagine having pure and wild happiness course through your veins.” He points to the Death Dust. “That’s what this is.”

I consider his words for a moment and glance back over to Hera and Från, who are now miles away and enveloped in one another on the couch. The rest of the party, it seems, has also partaken.

“Here…” Baron licks the back of his hand and dips it into the dust. The shimmery quality of it starkly contrasts with his golden skin and he holds it up to my face.

I look between him and his hand, finally understanding. Oh, he wants me to lick this off him.

Cedric’s hand plants on my shoulder as he turns me back towards him, leaning in. “Are you sure you want to?”

I laugh, only because it’s funny to see him now serious after the shenanigans he was pulling earlier. “I don’t see why we should be the odd ones out,” I say as I gesture to the rest of the room.

Cedric looks around himself and then looks back to me, as if he’s unsure that I am sure.

Without breaking eye contact, he licks the back of his hand and reaches over me to dip it in and then brings it back. I take in the look of it on his skin and it’s like the night sky shimmering.

“Wait,” I say. I do the same as him and bring my dust coated hand up to his mouth too. “Together?” He nods and we both lick one another’s hand, cleaning off the dust. The taste is sweet, like cinnamon and sugar mixed with…

Oh, Gods.

Pure ecstasy.

Baron lowballed this feeling.

It’s so much more. It feels like swimming in warm honey. Wading in it, rather. Slow and delicious throbs of peace. No more sadness. No more questions. My mind is all knowing and accepting.

Yes, it is.

My head falls back to the pillows, and I stare up to the skylights high above us, the night sky twinkling through. The universe. I am one with it. I am the star in the sky.