Page 61 of Of Shadows and Blood

“What a treat it is to have my old friends in my new home after so many years,” Rolan announces casually while motioning to a waiter for a refill. The aromas of the blood hit my head like a thick cloud causing my body to tilt sideways. My fingers grab the edge of the table and strain.

“Are you unwell?”

I pull myself from the fog, looking past Cedric to Rolan, who now wears an expression of worry. His smile lines crinkle with concern.

“I am well, thank you, Your Majesty,” I say softly, eyes darting from his face every other second to avoid that stare.

Rolan turns his attention to his cup. “Truthfully, I was unsure you would attend today.” Cedric opens his mouth to speak but Rolan continues. “Well, with not hearing from either of you for what was it, two years? We need this alliance to be ongoing more than ever, Cedric,” he adds, setting his cup down and nodding to the waiter for another refill.

More blood.

Cedric sips from his own and I fake a sip, trying to force myself despite the primal nature within me calling for it. Turning his chair slightly to Rolan, Cedric replies, “Ah, yes, we were dealing with some logistics at court. I apologize for the delayed correspondence, but we are happy to be here now.”

The court in front of us keeps their conversations low, no doubt attempting to eavesdrop. Everyone looks of a young age, no more than thirty years old, save for a few aged ones here and there.

“Not to worry, dear friend. Kingdoms to run and whatnot. Besides, with the Bloodrite having been completed, nuptials are in order. Have you two sorted through the ceremonies and crownings yet? Save a seat for this tired king.” Rolan winks whilst laughing before he drinks heavily, leaning to his other side to include another man seated with us.

“Eventually.” Cedric grins. “But hopefully sooner rather than later. I believe we’ll have invitations soon if the weather holds up, but who knows?”

Nuptials? Soon?

A wave of fight or flight floods my body, sounding the alarms within my head. They can’t make me marry him. My heart thumps a furious beat beneath my chest as I inhale, pause and exhale. Repeat. Any attempt at calm is futile.

I am not marrying anyone. I belong to no one. I am not doing this.

“Elivienne?”

My mind snaps back once more.

“You poor thing. She looks flushed. Should I call my cess?” Rolan stands from his chair to reach for me but Cedric reaches me first, whipping to my side and grabbing my arms. His touch makes me jump, a feeling that burns my skin despite my numbed senses.

“That won’t be necessary. Avonde?” Cedric motions to the healer, calling her to my side.

“Do you have some available chambers that she may rest for a moment, sir?” Avonde helps to scoot my chair back, thankfully taking Cedric’s place on my arms to move me up.

A servant quickly helps us exit discreetly, leading us to a room up the stairs and down a hall just above the banquet.

“I think I just need to sit for a moment,” I say, lowering onto a bench at the foot of the bed.

“I’ll fetch you some water.” Avonde slips out of the room, leaving me alone in the grandeur of this spare chamber. With one of the largest and most luxurious of beds I have ever seen, going unused, I wonder how the king could treat his lack of guests better than his people.

My eyes drift down to my left hand. The hand where a ring should sit. A ring signifying the union of lovers. I once wished for that union to be between Sawyer and I but now things have changed. It was never real.

Is any of this real?

Real is that I am betrothed to a king. How could I be expected to kindle a relationship with not only a stranger, but a monster?

Sawyer implied he came to me – in whatever dream state I was in – with purpose and reason. Was he trying to save me when I was asleep? I don’t see how I could have ever organically chosen Cedric over Sawyer in any life. But I did. And I cannot remember how.

Avonde sweeps in with towels and a basin of water.

“Here you are, Liv.”

I take a wet towel and apply it to my forehead and wrists, cooling down literally and figuratively. “We were fond friends, I take it.”

“I wondered when you would ask.” Avonde sits down next to me, wringing out a damp towel. “We were friends far before you fell ill. In fact, I grew up with the rest of you at the castle. My mother and father served Lux faithfully before I ascended the ranks and completed my training.”

“How many years?”