Page 78 of A Necessary Wife

Amelia’s face was flushed now, lips swollen, hair mussed, looking very much as if he had already made love to her.

He dragged a hand down his face, appalled at his loss of control yet again.

“We cannot continue like this,” he whispered.

She stiffened instantly. “I’m sorry.”

“I do not blame you.” He cursed softly. “I lose all sense when I touch you. I forget where we are. I almost made love to you in the schoolroom, of all places. Dear God, our children could have seen far too much of us both.”

Her voice was very small. “I know.”

He closed his eyes. “It terrifies me how unguarded we are,” he murmured. “I swore I would never feel this way again. Not after⁠—”

He stopped himself.

Amelia drew close and whispered, “It was never my intention to cause you pain.”

“I know,” he admitted. “It’s a different kind from what my first wife inflicted, yet I don’t want it to stop.”

Her breath hitched. “But it must.”

“Yes,” he agreed.

They stood together in the quiet schoolroom, desire still trembling between them, but something colder crept into the space after her words, too—fear that this unexpected passion would disappear one day.

He did not want that. He was enjoying being married too much, but that was only because of Amelia. He let out a shaky breath, knowing he was on a precipice. He did not want to do anything that changed how they were together, and yet change came to everyone.

“I need time,” he whispered.

“So do I,” she said quietly. “I’ll go see if I can find where Lucy has gone and send the children back to you. There are some things I must do now alone.”

“Thank you.” She was about to walk away when he recalled something that bothered him now. “Why did you leave the breakfast room so abruptly this morning?”

She bit her lip and looked away. “I thought my courses had begun.”

He stilled. “Have they?”

She shook her head. “Not yet, but I expect them any day now.”

A surge of hope filled him that Amelia might be carrying the child she longed for. Just a few more days and they’d know if he could fulfill his first promise and her reason for marriage. They made love often enough.

He remembered the letter she’d received earlier in the day and quickly hidden under her plate. “What did your sister write to you about this time?”

She looked at his sharply. “You didn’t read it?”

“Of course not. Never without your permission.”

“Thank you.” She wet her lip and an acute relief crossed her face.

Her damn family caused her so much pain and there was little he could do about the past hurts now. He was more determined than ever now to never let them see her again though. Only Reynolds had treated her kindly and would be welcome to visit them in Devon if Amelia wished him to come. He’d punish the rest by giving them the cut direct and letting it be known that he had done so.

“I should go,” she whispered.

“Yes, of course. I will keep the children with me for the afternoon and come and find you later.”

Her eyes rose and he almost kissed her again.

Around Amelia, desire never fully went away. He hoped it never did. He was keenly aware of her as she stepped around him and left the room without another word.