Page 36 of Broken

He liked her body too well. When he ran his hands over her legs at night, he yearned for her fine skin wrapped around his bare hips. He longed to take that fatal step and become her first lover.

Yet when her legs had parted wider last night— an innocent response to his tickling— his breath had lodged in his throat. He barely caught himself in time as he leaned forward to inhale the scent of her arousal, halting his intention to spread her legs wide and taste her.

Now in the cold light of day, he berated himself for his lack of control and his stupidity in spending too much time in her company outside the hour needed to soothe her pain away. Today, he needed to explain a few simple truths about how young women had to behave in society, what society expected of them, and the care she must take around him.

Giles had to make her understand and put some distance between them. Well, perhaps not understand the whole of it. He would not tell her exactly how well her body excited his, for instance. That would only complicate matters.

Once his hands touched her skin, Giles lost the ability to think and his world narrowed to the flesh under his fingertips. Lilly appeared to be his ultimate temptation and a direct path into the warmest corner of hell.

He would explain matters then leave, just as soon as her father returned from Wales. She didn’t deserve to have an unrepentant hedonist like him lusting after her. He would return to London and quench the thirst that raged through him with as many willing women as he could find. Anything to remove innocent Lilly from his mind.

Resolved, Giles stepped through the doorway and Lilly turned her face in his direction. Although he’d like to believe the sun triggered the response, he could swear that his heart stopped beating for a full minute.

Giles paused at her side and his fingers closed over her shoulder. He squeezed. The soft silk of her skin burned his fingers and he itched to steal his hand down into the bodice of her gown to touch those full orbs. He had not meant to touch her at all, but as usual he could not seem to help himself.

“Good afternoon, Giles.”

“Good afternoon, Miss Winter. I hope you have had a pleasant day,” he replied formally, as well as he may have done with any young lady in London.

He needed to change every mode of address given to her. After this conversation, Giles would watch his words more carefully and do more to behave like a real gentleman. Once his friends heard about this, if he could bear to confess his part in the situation, they would howl with laughter.

“Yes, thank you.” Lilly’s smile faltered. “Mrs. Osprey has been very good company, but I fear I have taken up far too much of your servant’s time. She must have other duties to attend to.”

“Her time is better served by being a companion to you.”

“I am used to being alone, Giles. I do not need to be entertained as a child might,” Lilly reminded him.

“No, you are not a child, and I do realize that far too well.” Giles had the opening he needed, but for the first time today, he feared he lacked the resolve to do this. “And that is why I want you to listen carefully to what I have to say.”

Lilly’s smile faded at his announcement, but she nodded for him to continue. Perhaps this would be more awkward than he had first thought. He slid into the adjacent chair and prayed he had not made too great an impact on her affections.

“Up until your arrival here last week, I was under the impression that you had died from the injuries of your accident.” He paused a moment to gauge her reactions, but he could see no shock. “Do you understand me? All those times our paths crossed in London, I assumed I was seeing a ghost.”

“I guessed as much.”

“You never spoke a word aloud, and no one ever saw you but me. You have to believe me when I tell you that if I had known you were real, I would not have let you remain to see the activities I was engaged in.”

Lilly’s head dropped so low he could not decide what her reaction was. He leaned forward in his chair and she pulled back. Well, at least he had a reaction of sorts.

“As you know, I lead a less than conventional life, and enjoy every minute of it. Seeing you as you were and allowing you to see me in those embraces was a gross failure on my part. Your father, if and when he learns, would be well within his rights to call me out or shoot me immediately. I wouldn’t blame him. You should not have been roaming around the halls alone in your nightgown.”

Lilly squirmed. “I knew you wouldn’t hurt me.”

“Miss Winter, gently bred young women should never be alone with men such as me. You do realize that, don’t you?” He waited for her to nod, but she never moved and he was forced to go on.

“You cannot be alone with me again. I am not to be trusted. If you had even the smallest inkling of the thoughts swirling through my head on most occasions, you would run screaming. Do not trust me or ever consider me safe. I don’t have women as friends, Miss Winter. I enjoy them until they scream. You would do well to distance yourself from me.” Giles stated it harshly, perhaps cruelly, but she needed to understand him clearly, once and for all.

“I know what you do with women, Giles. I have seen evidence enough of that, haven’t I?” She turned her face away.

“As I said, that was a grave mistake on my part.”

Lilly tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and her hand trembled. His heart squeezed at the pain he inflicted, but he had no choice. Lilly had to be protected from him.

“I thought you had made an exception and decided to befriend me, but in truth I could not even raise your interest in that. Despite what you intended, I thought I was your friend. You were mine,” she returned, steel lacing her tone.

Lilly stood, then laid a hand on his shoulder. She squeezed, just as he had done to her moments ago. Her scent wrapped around him, clogging his reasoning and threatening to unman him. He wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around her legs and pull her body into his. His decision to give up his association with Lilly troubled him, and he desperately wanted to take the cold words back.

But it was best for Lilly.