Page 61 of Love and Other Disasters

He found himself suddenly out of breath. In love. He steadied his breathing, and his hands, which had started to tremble. He was the third son. Overlooked as a husband by many, and women had climbed over him to reach Nash’s or Ravenswood’s notice. He’d known never to covet anything or anyone for himself because, in most cases, he would end up disappointed.

But as he watched Sophie step in front of him to bowl and then laugh as her shot went terribly wide, he knew there was no denying his feelings.

Love and other disasters had shown him what was missing in his life.

His first and last thought of every day for quite a while had been about Sophie and what she thought of him. There was good reason for his growing attachment to her. Jasper could be himself with her, and she didn’t seem to expect anything better. He could misbehave with her, and also enjoy doing nothing much of importance at all, and still be content. He was not constantly aware of his shortcomings or disliked for his ambitions. Sophie had her own, too. To be good, to be with those she loved, to be his friend.

They had knocked heads simply because they’d sensed the other’s needs perhaps, and feared them. But that earlier aggravation, the way they’d come together now, made him realize the sort of life they could have together. Open, honest, fun, and wicked, too.

Jasper had spent his life reluctantly bending to the will and needs of others. He would bend willingly if Sophie ever asked him to.

He prepared to bowl and placed his ball right beside Sophie’s instead of trying to always win. Wide of the mark, but sure of his target at last.

Jasper knew what he wanted, if he had the nerve to ask for Sophie’s hand. But what would Sophie say when he did? Could she believe a rake loved her and might never change his mind about that?

Chapter Eighteen

Sophie rushed the boys outside to take up their positions in a flurry of excitement to welcome the duke’s carriage home to Ravenswood the very next day. Lord Jasper continued past her, hurrying down the stairs to the carriage door to greet his brothers still seated. There was no sign of Isabelle with him, of course. He must have left her behind somewhere in the palace. “Your grace, welcome back.”

“It’s good to be home, brother,” Ravenswood called out, sounding weary to her ear.

“I didn’t expect you for weeks yet?” Jasper replied, leaning inside the conveyance.

What the duke said in response, she couldn’t quite catch.

“As you see,” Jasper he said, stepping back and gesturing with his arm, “the estate is as safe and sound as the day you departed.”

“Let’s go inside,” the duke said as he emerged, resplendent in black and frowning. “We need to talk.”

When Jasper threw a glance her way, Sophie grew concerned that the duke had learned about his visitors and the orgy.

Lord Nash emerged a moment later, his brow deeply furrowed as he looked up the steps at everyone. Sophie flexed her fingers on the shoulders of her charges, willing Nash to look down at his children and show some sign he’d missed them. It had been many weeks since he’d been home.

She curtsied deeply to the duke as he passed her by with the barest glance. “Your Grace, welcome home,” she murmured.

Ravenswood paused then, stared down at her and then at his nephews. “Thomas, Liam. I trust you’ve behaved while your father was gone.”

“Yes, they have, Your Grace,” she blurted out. The duke didn’t need to know about Thomas running off alone yet.

The duke grunted and went on his way. Their father came next and stopped to ask how she fared.

“We are very well, my lord,” she replied. “It is good to have you back at home.”

For a moment, she thought he might offer the boys a gesture of affection, or at least acknowledge them in some meaningful way. Unfortunately, it wasn’t to be that day. Lord Nash nodded to them. She flexed her fingers on the shoulders of her charges again, willing them not to move a muscle.

He nodded. “I should like to see you in the drawing room, Mrs. Radcliffe. Be prompt if you can.”

“We’ll be there directly.”

“No, Mrs. Radcliffe. Just yourself.”

“Of course,” she answered but was pained that Lord Nash would exclude the children after being away for so terribly long. They would never know their father if he kept this up.

He moved away, and Jasper took his place, frowning at her too. He looked at Lord Nash’s back and then at her. She could tell he wanted to ask her about the meeting, and what she might say about what had gone on while his brothers were away.

Nothing was her plan. Lord Nash did not need to know about the house party, their affair, or about Madam Clover’s surprise visit. And no one would hear about the orgy from her lips. If Lord Nash ever suspected anything had gone on, she would pretend ignorance and leave Jasper to explain everything.

There was also Isabelle to worry about now, too. She wondered how the duke would react to the presence of Lord Jasper’s bastard offspring being brought to the estate. Would they even notice the girl straight away? The duke surely might and have something to say about it. Sophie had grown very fond of the little girl and hoped she might continue taking care of her, too, along with Lord Nash’s sons. She could easily care for three.