Page 54 of Fallen Crown

“Brice.”

“I’m being honest. I don’t know why people always shrink away from an honest conversation.”

“You’ve told Maren how you feel?”

“I don’t even know how I feel.” A lie. Sort of. I definitely feel something. “I just think her husband is a useless piece of shit.”

“I’m glad Grace isn’t talking yet.”

I rock her and brush her hair off her forehead. Suddenly, I’m wondering about a baby with black hair and eyes like the sky. Maren would murder me for even considering it. But the image won’t fade. If Tucker wasn’t married, I think I’d ask her to consider being my baby mama. We could coparent together, I’m sure of it. Not sure how I’d broach that subject, given what she’s already gone through.

“Whether or not you agree with her marriage, you have to respect it.”

The idea makes my blood boil. As far as I can see, Enzo doesn’t respect his marriage a whole lot, so I’m not sure why I should value it more than he does.

“Did you respect Alex’s pending marriage to Simone?”

“Oh, you are grumpy today.” Rory crosses her arms. “You’ve got a lot going on, so I’m going to let that warped truth slide. But here’s what I’ll say. Yes, I would have respected his marriage to her if he’d actually gotten married. Would have killed me. A piece of me would have died to do it, but I would not have interfered. It’s why I went to Canada. He made a choice, and I wasn’t it.”

“I wasn’t an available choice when Tucker married him.”

“Are you saying you want to be a choice now?”

“I don’t know.”

“Pushing her toward something you’re not even sure you want isn’t kind. It’s cruel. And you’re not the sort to be deliberately cruel.”

“I should have gone to talk to Nick instead.”

“You would have liked his advice better?” Rory lets out a little laugh.

“Probably not. I think he’d murder anyone who tried to get with Jules. I just don’t see Enzo as the murdering sort, given that he’s chosen to be in America rather than here.”

“Has Maren filed for divorce yet? Or a separation at least?”

Since talking about Enzo seems to draw her away from me, I haven’t brought him up since we went camping. I have no idea what the status of her marriage is, but judging by the way she jumped off the bed last night, her marriage isn’t DOA yet. When we’re together, we mostly pretend like he doesn’t exist. I’m sure Rory would have a thing or two to say about that as well.

“I asked her to come to the funeral.”

“As your guest?” Rory narrows her eyes. “I still have a lot to learn about royal rules, but that seems like a bad idea.”

“I’m inviting the whole team, but I want her there.”

“Are you sure you aren’t clinging onto her because she’s someone and not because she’s someone special? Months ago, you said you wanted this adventure race because your brothers had something or someone beyond The Crown. If you take Alex and Julia as an example, he loved what she represented, but he never loved her. Not really. Do you love Maren, or do you love the idea of her?”

“Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Back up the love train. I never said I was in love with Maren. I said her husband was a shit, and I’d happily help her end that disaster. That’s it.”

“What does Maren want?”

That is a great question, and one I have not once considered. I understand what she doesn’t want. She doesn’t want to be labeled a cheater, and she’s not the type to quit or give up on anything.

“I don’t know,” I admit. “We haven’t really talked about it.”

“Sounds like an honest conversation worth having. Even if you don’t know how you feel, it’s important to know what she wants. And if saving her marriage is it, then you’ve got to respect that and maybe consider putting some distance between you two.”

None of that sounds like anything I want to do. “I’ll take your opinion under advisement.”

Rory laughs and then lets out a deep sigh.