Page 51 of The Saint

Rolly was my person. My ride or die. The only one who could see through every shield I put up and never tried to tear them down. He’d sit with me, his presence gently lapping at me until that armor wore away.

And now that my armor was gone, I felt every last ounce of pain.

Climbing from the bathtub, I barely dried myself off and tossed on an oversized t-shirt before I collapsed against the wall in the hall, my shorts in hand, unable to make it any further. I didn’t want to see the windows, to see how bright and cheery it was, or, more likely, how dark it had gotten as the sun crossed the sky to find sleep below the horizon. I didn’t want to know how many hours had passed since I’d left the Giordanos’ house. I didn’t want to feel this way, even though I knew I deserved every last bit of it.

A knock sounded at my door, and at first, I didn’t bother to move. But a second knock, more urgent than the first, had me clawing my way up from my seat on the floor, if for no other reason than to get the nose to stop.

My back ached, my eyes were swollen, and my skin still felt frozen from the icy water that had rained down on me after all the hot water had gone away. Shuffling across my apartment, I rubbed my eyes with my palms, then tugged my damp hair off my back, barely able to care that whoever was at the door was going to see me in this half-dressed state.

Another knock sounded as I reached for the door, this one a quiet rap that made me wonder if I’d been hearing things. I pulled it open and found Rolly standing there, head against his arm as he leaned it against the doorjamb.

I was so numb, so wrapped up in the despair that had worked its way through every fiber of my body, that I didn’t even react. Not until Rolly lifted his head, locking me in his sights, then pushed through the doorway, kicking the door shut behind him as he took my face between his hands.

His lips melded to mine, sealing my breath in my chest. He pulled me closer, lifting me, tugging at me like he could make me grow to his height if he kept it up. And the hard press of his mouth became a gentle wave of relief as he let loose, skimming his lips across mine over and over until I was gasping for breath.

Invitation or not, Rolly took advantage of my gasp, his tongue slipping into my mouth, a much-needed interruption to the misery that had consumed me. His fingers tangled in my hair, one hand sliding down my back as he pushed his way farther into my apartment, backing me into a wall.

“Jael,” he murmured, his mouth detaching from mine before descending to my jaw. He sucked down the column of my throat while his hands lowered and hooked around the back of my thighs.

My fingers gripped at his shoulders as he yanked me up, and my thighs tightened around his hips as his mouth found mine again.

I was lost in the feelings, lost in the desire to be as close to him as possible after fearing I’d never see him again. And it wasn’t until he edged back enough to look me in the eye, when I felt the hard prod of his dick against the thin fabric of my underwear, that the fog of lust cleared enough for me to remember where I was.

“You’re killing me, David.” His gaze lowered, catching on my tongue as it swept across my swollen lips. His fingers inched upward, and I could feel the tips digging into my skin as they slid under the fabric.

“Why?” The word was just a breath, and I wasn’t entirely sure what I was asking about.

In response, Rolly only groaned, the sound washing over me as his hips thrust forward. I whimpered, the feel of him pressing against me suddenly the only thing on my mind.

Breathless, I whispered, “Oh.”

“‘Oh,’ she says.” Before I could respond, Rolly’s hands gripped tighter, pulling me into him, then his fingertips dipped into the aching place between my legs.

“I want to be in here,” he murmured, dragging the tip of his finger up and down my seam. “I want to fuck you, David. I want to fuck you until you never worry again whether I’ll come back to you or not.”

He drove two fingers into me as his mouth crushed down on mine, swallowing any reply I could have possibly given. It was as if he cracked me open, cleaved me in two, spread me out in front of him until he learned every one of my secrets and thoughts.

Rolly was five steps ahead of me, changing the pace of the thrust and slide of his fingers, tugging at my lips with his teeth before tangling his tongue with mine. I wanted to cry out in frustration at being brought so close to the edge of an orgasm before he backed off again, leaving me stranded and desperate for more of him.

“Rolly, please,” I begged, needing this to be over, to be dropped off the edge of this cliff I was dangling over.

It was then that he yanked my underwear to the side, and he swallowed my gasp as he thrust so hard into me, I thought I might die.

“Fuck.” He edged back, peeking down between us. I looked too and felt blood rushing to my cheeks at the sight of him spearing me. “You’re so fucking amazing, David. I can’t—”

With my body still pinned to the wall, he dragged himself out of me, then slowly dipped back in. I couldn’t watch the way he did. I looked up and got lost in the wonder on his face. The pure awe that was painted there the way I’d seen it as we watched a beautiful sunset. The same look I’d seen when he was engrossed in a drawing he was creating, was etched upon his face as he watched himself disappear inside of my body again and again.

He let out a groan as he buried himself deep, then leaned his head forward, his lips connecting to the skin of my throat. “So fucking perfect,” he told me, picking up his pace. “So damn beautiful, it hurts.”

His lips silenced mine, cutting off any retort, and his thumb came down between us, rubbing at my clit.

It was exactly what I needed, my thoughts silenced as he drove my body insane. Then I was falling, dropping off that cliff with nothing but his body holding me up. He swallowed every gasp and moan I let out, as if it were food for his soul and he could never get enough.

Then he was shaking, his hands latching onto my legs, and he thrust harder, his mouth failing to reach mine as radiance shone from within him. No sunset I’d ever seen was as gorgeous as he was, with the sheen of sweat across his brow, the pained look of ecstasy written on every inch of his face. I wanted to memorize him, stare at him the way he always stared at me, make him feel as if he could trust me with his every thought, because as long as he’d have me, I’d be his.

Rolly’s pace slowed, his grip loosening, while his breath huffed from his lungs. He buried his face in my neck, whispering quietly, “Don’t worry, carina. I’ve got you. I’m right here.”

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