Page 59 of Blue Moon

Chapter 25

Sawyer

Iwalked out of my place, got into my Tesla, and drove straight to the nearest bar.

Sol loved me?

What the fuck? How could she love me? She didn’t even know me.

I never wanted that. Ever. I’d told her from day one that I didn’t do relationships. I had her sweet, tight, virgin pussy so strong on my brain that I couldn’t think straight. I should’ve never asked her to be my girlfriend.

I don’t want that life. I don’t want to be responsible for anyone but myself.

I called Beck.

“What’s up?”

“I just wanted to make sure that you never changed my orders.”

Beck paused. I didn’t want him questioning me. Not tonight.

“I haven’t finalized them yet. I thought you might reconsider. Maybe you could get stationed with me in San Diego. Paloma and Sol really seemed to like each other.”

“I don’t want to go to San Diego. I want to go to Japan.”

“Are you okay, Huck? Did you guys break up?”

“No, man the opposite. She just told me she loved me.”

“Ah. And you freaked out. Look, you aren’t going to fuck this up. You’re a better man when you’re with her. A good man, in fact. And you’re happy with her. You don’t have to propose or anything. Just see where it goes.”

I’d had enough of this shit. “Look, Daly. I don’t need you or Sol psychoanalyzing me. I never led anyone on. I don’t want to settle down. Finalize my fucking orders.”

“You’re making a mistake, man. I can tell you love her.”

“No, Beck. You made a mistake thinking I could change. You’ve been right about me from day one. I’m a jackass. I don’t care about Sol. I don’t care about you. I only care about myself.”

I hung up the phone. I arrived at the bar and ordered a shot of bourbon. I had to end it with Sol. No hard feelings, but it, whatever it was, had run its course. I didn’t want to be with her anymore. I just wanted to be alone.