Page 68 of Carte

“I heard you sang for me tonight.”

I tipped my head, “And how could you possibly know that? You weren’t even there.”

He chuckled, “I have my ways.”

Something released inside me knowing that even though he couldn’t physically be with me, he still made sure I was safe.

“I miss you, Warden” I whispered looking down at my lap. “It didn’t feel right playing without you there. I sang that song, just so I could feel you with me.”

“I’m always with you, Dynamo.” he said softly. “Besides, I’ll be back in two days.”

I frowned, “That just means I have to sleep in an empty bed for two more nights.”

Carter laughed, the sound tickling my eardrum. I could picture him in my mind as he threw his head back, while the butterflies on his neck fluttered their wings with his hilarity.

“Jerk,” I grumbled, not really meaning the words.

He sobered up after a few beats.

“I want you to be extra careful these next two days. Trevor’s with me, and Max had to go back home so couldn’t stay.”

“Yeah, these new guys aren’t really friendly. They just haul me where I need to be without any pleasantries.”

"They're good at what they do,” he assured me. “But I still want you to keep your eyes out. Better safe than sorry.”

The car came to a stop in front of the hotel.

“We’re here,” I murmured as my new bodyguard opened my door. At least Trevor was friendly and chatted with me about superficial stuff, and his hometown. There was a curious glint in his eye when I asked if he had a girl back home, but he kept his mouth shut. But, now I didn’t even have his hulking form to tease.

“Okay, I’ll let you go,” Carter sighed. “Text me when you get to your room, and before you go to sleep. I don’t care how late it’s going to be. I want to say goodnight to you.”

“I will,” I smiled as I walked across the lobby.

Those three words were on the tip of my tongue. It would be so easy to say them, so natural. Like breathing.

Still I swallowed them down. I wasn’t sure Carter was ready to hear them yet. I still got the glimpse of fear in his cognac eyes when he looked at me. And I didn’t want my admission to send him to the hills.

“Talk later, Dynamo.”

“Bye, Warden,” I sing-songed.

All I could think about in bed later that night was how I wished Carter was here. After my shower, I sat down on the bed and words spilled from me. Words that made even me cry. I checked every window and lock twice. I even spied the muscle standing in front of my room’s door through a peephole for a minute or two, just to make sure I wasn’t all alone.

Despite all of that, I never felt lonelier.

Pressure built in my eyes until I couldn’t hold it back anymore and tears spilled trailing down the sides of my face.

My whole life I was alone. No one beside me. I was honestly scared that that would be how my life was going to look like. Then I met him. And everything changed.

I had Carter.

At the thought, I reached to my bedside table and pressed his contact.

He answered on the first ring, “You in bed?”

“Yes,” I hiccupped.

“What’s wrong?” I could hear the panic in his voice.